Post # 1
So my mother doens’t like the location I’m having my wedding.
She doens’t like my wedding colors
She doesn’t like my ideas for flowers…
She doesn’t like 1/2 the people on my guest list.
She thinks the Save the dates where a waste of money.
She likes my dress, but that’s because SHE picked it out!
Fine. Ok I say. We’ll just have to agree to disagree, cause this is MY Fing wedding and I’m paying for it, so I will get what I want.
Well, my problem is that she’s calling all the family, being very vocal about her opinions on not liking ANYTHING about my wedding. I hate that…cause this is not about her…it’s about me…and I don’t want her to put in other people’s mind that my wedding is over the top or something, just because I don’t want to do it her way.
Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Why can’t she just go along with the flow of things??
Post # 3
I’ve said it so many times on here. STOP TELLING HER THINGS!
Tell her as little as possible. Everything should be on a need to know basis. When I started doing that with my Mother it changed everything.
Post # 5
STOP TELLING YOUR MOTHER ABOUT THINGS
Post # 6
OP: The phrase “I want you to be suprised on the day of the wedding” will get you very far in maintaining sanity.
Post # 7
I had a long long talk with my aunt about the situation and she said that my mother just wants to be included on the wedding.
So now, I’m just going to give her some tasks to do, and then keep the rest to myself.
🙂 I’m all about reducing the drama!
Post # 8
I feel your pain, truly I do! Read my first rant about my mom. http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/mob-ruins-christmas-help
If anything it will give you a little chuckle! 🙂
Honestly, I don’t agree with the “don’t tell her anything” that really does make it worse. Instead, tell her LIMITED things and your absolutely right, give her TASKS! Make her feel useful.
I can’t say all the problems are solved with my mom because I honestly haven’t found the ability to forgive her yet for Christmas, but when I give her “tasks” she feels useful.
Recently I asked her to come to the cake tasting. She said, “I hate cake” (which is not true) I forced her to go, and it was a good time. Don’t take no for an answer and keep including her. If anything at the end of the experience when she says “you didn’t want me apart of this anyway” you can say, “I tried to include you every step of the way!”Oh sweet vengeance! 🙂
Anyway, lastly, about the talking to other family members. Best tactic, stay quiet and let her rant and rave. The other people in the family KNOW she’s the one being off her rocker. Don’t do anything that would make them suspect otherwise. Doing counter ranting and raving of your own won’t help you win at all.
Hope that helps.. and you are not alone!