- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2014
My mother is just an emotional rollercoaster for me. At first she reacted negatively and then out of nowhere she seems excited and purchased pink invitations when she knew my colours were blue. We talked within the last week about how I had planned most of it already and how I had a vision but it seems to have gone into one ear and right out the other.
FI’s suit arrived at her house yesterday and I was trying to include her more in the planning process so I showed her right away. She actually reacted positively and noted that I should find a seamstress to hem the pants for him. But that is what got her going… she then noted that I HAD to try my dress on again this weekend so we can see how it needs alterations because it was very snug last time. First off, it was not snug – it fit me with a little extra wiggle room! Plus, I ordered it because it matched my measurements and had no intention of altering it unless my body changes.
Then she started on making sure I had actually confirmed my venue and officiant for my date/time (as if I’d overlook that) which then led to catering. She wanted to see the menu I had and I showed it to her thinking she’d like the options – wrong. She had apparently wanted to see that there were trayed finger foods instead of only a plated meal or buffet option. She said “There is no need to have a big sit down meal since your wedding isn’t formal enough”
At this point I backed up and just politely excused myself because if I opened my mouth about it I would’ve flat out insulted my mother and started a fight. But to top it off, on the way out the door she said that I should figure out how to print on those invitations she got me. I told her last week I wasn’t using those and that I was ordering my own!!!
I don’t know how else to tell her to back off and just let me plan my wedding! I don’t want to just exclude her from the details as I am moving out this year and it’d be a good thing for her to be more involved. I don’t know if it would be better to discuss this with her again and risk hurting her feelings or just ignore her input when it doesn’t match my vision… this is so frustrating!