(Closed) mother of bride needs help ASAP

posted 8 years ago in Reception
  • poll: Bride wants wine and beer at reception. Groom wants wine only. What should happen?
    Bride should be allowed to have both beer and wine. It's not asking a lot. : (45 votes)
    61 %
    Groom has the last word and it should be wine only. : (1 votes)
    1 %
    What the pastor wants should not even be a considering factor. : (22 votes)
    30 %
    Give the bride what she wants. It's her day too and groom needs to learn to compromise. : (6 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    7174 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    I think you should leave the decision up to your daughter and her fiance to decide and workout between the two of them.  

    I personally don’t see how wine is different than beer, in the Baptist faith… but, obviously it is in your Future Sister-In-Law mind.

    Post # 4
    Member
    433 posts
    Helper bee

    Will the reception be on church property?

    Post # 6
    Member
    1391 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I don’t really see how the groom thinks just having wine makes it any better?? If they are having the reception at the church and it’s against their rules than that solves that problem. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    610 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I think that if your daughter wants to have wine and beer at the wedding he groom should at least listen to her. The pastor’s opinion doesn’t matter…

    I would tell her though about the dry wedding, people are not coming to her wedding to drink. They are coming to celebrate the union of the bride and groom. I don’t think no alchohol=boring. Are they planning on doing a champagne toast???

    Post # 8
    Member
    1418 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Well I think the choice to serve alcohol at a wedding is theirs to make, but serving alcohol is still serving alcohol – even if it is just wine.  Many people choose to limit the bar for a variety of reasons, but typically both beer and wine are served to allow for selection for the guests.  Not everyone likes wine, and not everyone likes beer, so it is nice to offer both as a compromise.

    On the other hand, many couples choose to have a dry reception.  There have been many brides here on weddingbee who have done this and it was successful.  Just because you are not serving alcohol does not mean people cannot have a good time.

    It is up to the bride and groom ultimately, but most people like to consider their guests, budget, and personal beliefs when choosing what beverages to have available.  Tell your daughter not to stress!  The wedding will be wonderful no matter what drink(s) are served.

    Post # 9
    Member
    2373 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2008

    I think the bride and groom should have what they want and it’s odd a pastor is also a wedding planner 🙂  Your daughter is going to have to work it out with her husband and they both need to agree. Stay out of it as much as possible, one thing I’ve always hated about my in-laws is they meddle in our issues instead of letting us work (okay, sometimes battle) it out 😀

    Post # 11
    Member
    1498 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    If the groom didn’t drink and neither did his family, I could understand wanting a dry reception.  But the fact that alcohol will be served, means that any kind of alcohol should be fine.  Personally, I have some guests that would be upset if I only served wine and not beer along with it.  A lot of people don’t like wine and I think you’d be doing a disservice to your guests by not offering beer.

    Post # 12
    Member
    708 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    A friend of mine just went to a wedding in France. They only served wine. My friend’s husband hates wine and didn’t drink during the reception. This wedding was several month ago, and my friend’s husband is STILL talking about how he couldn’t even get a beer at the wedding. Just another perspective.

    As for the pastor… I don’t think his thoughts on this matter are relevant.

    Post # 13
    Member
    6998 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: February 2011

    a wedding without alcohol?! i know alot of people do it but for me that is not an option. i don’t think that the pastor should any say in it? i voted for let her do what she wants but now that im thinking about it isnt a part of marriage compromise? if she wants beer and wine and he isnt to thrilled about either why not just do the wine? a couple glasses would be enough for me 😉

    Post # 14
    Member
    10367 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    The pastor’s opinion should not be a deciding factor. Every person is entitled to their own way to live, and the pastor should not be able to dictate that. I think beer and wine being served is really the bare minimum of what should be there, and is completely reasonable. If people are religious and don’t want to drink, they don’t have to. But it certainly isn’t as though alcohol turns the rest of us into blithering sinners. I think it’ll be fine!

    Post # 15
    Member
    10 posts
    Newbee

    @mobgreek: I personally think that it was wrong for the paster to try and add his imput, yes his opinion maybe valuable, but its all up to the bride and groom themeseleves to make their own decision.

    The topic ‘mother of bride needs help ASAP’ is closed to new replies.

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