Post # 1
So, my future Mother-in-law came over today and showed me the dress she bought for the wedding. It is a very gorgeous dress, lace, and super bright red. Our colour scheme is black/white/soft pink. Although it is a very nice dress, I feel like when it comes to pictures it will be all nice black/white scheme and then BOOM RED DRESS. (And is it just me or does bright red clash with soft pink??)
My mom is in a black and white dress, our bridal party are in black suits and dresses with soft pink accents (shoe’s, bridesmaids jewelry etc).
My finance understands and does agree it will look off in the pictures. His moms mentioned that she bought it because it was a good deal and would wear the dress to other occasions, and she’s going to keep looking anyway to see what else is out there.
Should we bother to say something to her? Maybe remind her of the colour scheme?
Honest feedback would be greatly appreciated! Thanks!!!
I should add, I wouldn’t care if a guest wore red or a bright colour. But when it comes to immediate family (ie. parents, siblings) I have mixed feelings.
Post # 3
No i think it will be absolutely fine.
My MIL is wearing bright yellow with an open back and tummy (she’s pretty young at heart, she wants to show off her belly ring and back tattoo…i know, i know). At first i was a bit taken aback but now i don’t care too much.
Post # 4
Will she be in many photos with your bridesmaids (I assume they are wearing pink)? I was worried about my MIL’s dress looking off in our photos, but since she wasn’t in many photos with our BMs it looked totally fine.
Post # 5
I think she will look fine in the photos. I think red and pink won’t clash, and she won’t be in many photos with your bridesmaids anyways. I actually think it would like nice if there were black suits, your white dress, and her red one in family photos.
Post # 6
Thanks for the feedback already ladies!!
Bridemaids are wearing black, with soft pink shoe’s, flowers, jewelry.
She will really only be in family photo’s. The normal one’s that would be taken at any wedding. So really besides that, I’m sure it would be fine.
I’m trying to attach a photo but it’s not working.
Post # 8
@btw: I think if you want to encourage her to buy a different dress, you could say something like, “I know you mentioned that maybe you were going to keep looking at dresses, so I wanted you know that I would LOVE to go shopping with you – that would be so fun!” But honestly I don’t think a red dress will be a problem at all.
Post # 9
Hmmm at first I thought you were being a bit ridiculous BUT…that dress looks like something for the club. How long is it on her? How old is she? If something can be said to her without hurting her feelings then I think I would in this situation.
Post # 10
I feel slighty ridiculous lol 🙂 That’s why I wrote on here, to get some perspective.
She’s 57. It does go down to her knee’s. I’m assuming it is pretty tight. She is really into fashion and flashy clothing. So this choice doesn’t really surprise me.
She did seem open to feedback and I do feel like we could say something subtle, if I even decide to say anything at all.
Really appreciate all the feedback!!
Post # 11
I really do not think it will be a problem at all.
Post # 12
I don’t see why it would be a problem.
Post # 13
It’s not a problem and if she loves it and it makes her feel great, it is the right dress!
Post # 14
@btw: I don’t see it as a problem. My MIL wore hot pink where I had red in the wedding Like you are with the pink. I think us brides can worry too much about colours. I like the dress she has chosen too.
Post # 15
Take a deep breath. This really isn’t a big deal. Your FMIL is an adult and can dress herself. Any decent photographer can process your photos so that the colors look fine, even if there’s a big contrast.
Post # 16
Could be worse, my mom dressed in funeral black. Even showed me weeks before “I’m thinking of wearing this!”. “Ok mom, that looks fine” (Sure I thought it was ridiculous… but I gave up making sense of her long ago!). She loves DH. He humors her more than I ever could and I think he does it just so I can have time with dad who I’m super close to. He does their yardwork, will go on little sleep to take mom to the hospital to see dad when he’s sick (MS) even tho she has a license.
Doesn’t sound like she will, but if she looks odd it’s on her not you!
As far as being flashy, some people just are. My grandmother loved bright lipstick and nail polish. When she died it was in her apartment and they found her because she hadn’t come to her part time job in two days (they asked for a wellness check, she was 76). The funeral home painted her nails a gaudy color, so we all thought, to hide the discoloration of the nail beds… but it was also a gaudy color she’d have worn! It was an old family funeral home so they knew her well enough I’m sure they figured it’d be fine… and it was… because she was flashy. She’d show up in the inappropriate dress, dump water on someone at a reunion.. but you know what? Those are the things we miss most!