(Closed) Mother of the Bride…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I wonder if your mother is trying to hold it in instead of showing you her emotions?  Are your parents the ones who are paying for the wedding?  If they are, it kind of is ‘their wedding’ since you have to have their approval to spend their money unfortunately.  I hope that your mother stops being so horrible though!

Post # 5
Member
303 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

It might help if you can involve her in some of the wedding plans? Ask her to help you shop for a dress, look at invitations, etc. Sometimes a little involvement is all parents are looking for. If you do involve her, make sure you listen to her ideas (even if you don’t use them), and if they’re not what you like, gently and respectfully tell her that you had something else in mind, then ask her to help you with that.

Post # 6
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

That is so strange.  I wonder if she thinks that you don’t have the money to spend on a wedding?  Or is she just always passive-agressive?  I would maybe pull back from sharing as many details with her since she just seems to want to poop on them!

Post # 7
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

Work with your dad instead. 😉 Some mothers just are not supportive in wedding planning, and it’s honestly less difficult and painful to plan without them.

Post # 9
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

I’m sort of doing the same thing… I involve my dad in big decisions, and my mom when her criticisms won’t bother me. She gets annoyed about it, but wedding planning is hard enough without a nitpicky mother!

Post # 10
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

My mother wanted to be involved since she and I were not talking when I got the married the first time and she missed out on everything.

Problem is, all she does is complain about her job and my aunt the entire time every time we talk.  I try to tell her about wedding stuff and she literally ignores me and I can hear here talking to the dogs in the background on the phone.

I don’t even want to see her at Christmas, I kinda wish we still weren’t talking. This were happier and easier when we weren’t.

Post # 11
Member
1523 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I always dreamed that my Mom and I would plan my wedding together, but she has shown no interest in doing so with me which has bummed me out. I called her when I found my dream dress on my own and her comment was “that’s a lot of money, why don’t we go look in David’s bridal?”

I have no advice since I feel like I have been putting out fires with her recently, but I do understand what you are going through! 

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