- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Does anyone else expecting get the impression that there is a great deal of exaggeration out there about the all-consuming loss of self in motherhood? I’m currently about to hit 30 weeks and everyone from coworkers to family and everything from blogs to articles seem to underline the loss of a woman’s almost whole being for the sake of raising a child. I get that when my child comes in 10 weeks, I’m going to be overwhelmed with poopy diapers, cluster-feeding, lack of sleep, and general upheaval of life as I know it, but the comments that continue to get to me are the ones that seem to insinuate that the intimacy in my relationship with my husband is gone forever, and I can kiss the idea of ever going back to the gym again goodbye so get used to being a good 20lbs heavier fatty. Oh and forget going out with your husband or your friends alone again. No time for that. Oh you think you’ll have time to clean? haha, that’s funny. But if you don’t clean we’ll judge you for not cleaning anyway…
Again, I’m not there yet but its almost like some people are a complete killjoy about this whole parenting business. Will I have shitty days as a parent? Yeah and I expect them. Will I look at my house and want to cry at how bad its gotten? Oh abso-fucking-lutely! Will my husband and I hit a dry spell? No freaking doubt! But isn’t it all about finding a balance? Why do so many make motherhood out to be almost a whole sacrifice of your entire self? And why does that seem to be the basic theme in even media of “Motherhood sucks and you’re never the same and you’re going to deal with so much shit but don’t worry its worth it”?
So… anyone else getting the vibe that there are motherhood killjoys out there?