(Closed) Mourning my soon to be lost last name

posted 7 years ago in Names
Post # 3
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

@bluewolverine: its hard. I ended up dropping my middle, and then taking my maiden as my middle. This way, I am never not associated with that name. It definitely takes some getting used to, I just sent out an email notifying everyone in my contact list about the email change, and it didn’t cause too many issues. But I will say, that my personal I only changed my display name, and didn’t change my actual email address. It was just too much of a pita, but I had to change my work email

Post # 4
204 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I totally understand. I never considered not taking my DH’s last name, but at the same time it’s sooo strange to know that I no longer am the same person I’ve been for 29 years!  In fact, I still forget all the time and introduce myself with the wrong name!  I’m so proud of my heritage, and it is really strange that people who meet me in the future won’t even know that I am a Maiden Name.  That said, I know in the next year, I’ll get used to the name and on our 30th anniversary, I will have been Smores Married Name longer than I was Smores Maiden Name. 

And you’re 100% right that going through all the actual name changing is kind of a pain.  I say mourn the loss of your last name, but embrace the new name as a symbol of your new life!  I’m sure you’ve thought of this, but you could always change your name to be Bluewoverine MaidenName MarriedName.  I didn’t do that because my middle name has family significance, but otherwise, I would have definitely considered that.

Post # 5
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

I was happy to change my last name, as my maiden name was pretty odd and always misspelled. Didn’t matter much on the misspelling part, tho, since this name is spelled wrong just as often!

Post # 6
7606 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Aww, I hear ya.  I’ve been thinking about that, too!  I’ll be going from a name that has ALWAYS been mispronounced to one that people look at in terror and don’t even TRY to pronounce.  *sigh*

They just look at it, say the first syllable and then trail off.  There’s a silent J for pete’s sake!

I’m still excited about it in a way, too, though. 🙂

Post # 7
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Yeah, I’m going through all of that right now. The night before I changed it I kind of had a freak out, like I’m losing the person I was before (I’m not, lol). I feel like I’m shedding the skin of who I was as a child and am now becoming this adult person and it’s a really weird feelilng. Not to mention it’s really hard to remember to sign my new last name on my signature.

I definitely agree that I want our whole family to have the same last name but it’s sad that I no longer have the name I grew up with, the name that made me my original family. I know I’m not old but it makes me feel old to be a Mrs. Somebody and to have changed my name. It’s a good feeling, but it’s one that will take some getting used to.

@ItWasntMe: I also have an easier new last name than my maiden, so it’s nice not having to spell it every time!

Post # 8
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Yes, it’s going to be odd.  I’ve made a “name” (no pun intended) for myself at work with my current name, and now I feel like that is going to all be lost.  Also, my new married name is going to rhyme with my first name and I am dreeeading it terribly.  It’s like Julia Gulia from “The Wedding Singer.” I cringe when I think about it.  But, hopefully it will grow on me.

Post # 9
5667 posts
Bee Keeper

I can’t believe I only have a year left with my maiden name. I’m going to try to make it part of my middle name (First Middle Maiden Last) but I don’t want to drop my current middle name because it’s my grandmother’s name and has meaning to me. FI’s last name is fine and easier to spell and pronounce than my maiden name but I’m still sad.

Post # 10
198 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I decided to keep my maiden name as a second middle name. I am still in the process of changing everything over and it is still weird to me but I do get some comfort from seeing my name still intact just with another one added to the end. Professionally I am keeping my name: First Maiden Last since it is a recognizable name. My old last name was unique and hard to spell by my new one is more common which is a plus sometimes but it means that I am having a hard time creating a new email account! Good luck

Post # 12
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@bluewolverine: I’m in mourning too!!! I feel like i’ve really just started getting established in the business world and to from an easy to prounce/remember name to a difficult one is a bummer 🙁 I feel like I’m losing part of my identity!

I know I sound a little crazy but even though I love Fiance to death…it’s eating me inside to know that me and Future Mother-In-Law will be the same Mrs. Lastname. Ugh.

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