(Closed) Moving Cross Country: How to make new friends

posted 6 years ago in Home
Post # 3
Member
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Congratulations on your new adventure πŸ™‚

It can be really difficult. I did it once 3 years ago but it was for a grad program, which in some way meant built-in friends. I’m moving to the US from Canada next year to join my partner and I’m worried about how I’ll make friends outside of the sort of automatic, easy way. I think your thoughts of getting something part-time and taking classes will help; they’re pretty much my only ideas other than capitalizing off my partner’s existing friends…

Hopefully someone else has other tips!

Post # 4
Member
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

We did it, meaning moved 3000 miles away across country.

You have to make yourself go out and do things and talk to people. From going to a low key bar or a dog park (if you have a dog) going to the same gym class, meetup,com. It takes effort.

Its kind of like dating. But you have to be more forward. If someone is nice and you think they would be a good friend you have to reach out and make plans. Maybe its meeting at another class, or going to get coffee or drinks, but YOU have to make the plans.

It can be tough to find friends, but its doable. Remember, for awhile you are the one making the effort because likely most people have a circle of friends and support already so they are less likely to reach out. You cant take it as an insult, its just the way it is. Imagine if you met someone nice where you are. You wouldnt think “oh new friend” you would think “oh, nice person”

Post # 5
Member
915 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Congrats on your husbands new job!

I moved two months ago to a new city, and it’s been tricky for me so far. I’ve never had a problem making new friends, I just haven’t really found anything I wanted to get involved in yet, and thus haven’t really been meeting a lot of new people. (It doesn’t help matters, for me, that my Fiance has a lot of friends here, but they’re either single guys or have girlfriends I just have nothing in common with.)

I think your idea to get a part time job is a good one, as is taking classes! I’m interested to see the Bees other suggestions. 

Post # 6
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

show your boobs. 

Post # 7
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

or send me MONEY to come visit you! Money MouthMoney Mouth

Post # 8
Member
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

We didn’t move very far away but still wanted to make friends in our new town. The first year not much interaction but at the beginning if the second year we got a dog…..now it seems we know everyone! I even met one of my BMs at the dog park!

Post # 10
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I have done that a few times, including to a new continent, and am going to do it again next year!

I would recommend voilunteering and joining some sort of club. Put yourself out there. Meetup is a great resource.

Also, don’t rush. Friendships happen, and it can be unexpected.

 

Good luck πŸ™‚

Post # 11
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I’m from boise πŸ™‚  If you like concerts there’s a pretty groovy music scene…always meeting new people that way. 

 

I don’t live there anymore…live in Seattle now.  I found moving to Seattle was harder in the making new friends department.  We resorted to meetup.com but have made tons of friends now and have a good circle and at least one COUPLE  that we double with all the time πŸ™‚

Post # 12
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Ohh…also adding boise based groups on Facebook to get notifications about different events to check out? 

And hopefully you love college football…mainly Bronco Nation?!  Boise State games, tailgaiting, all around insanity is pretty much the usual lol.

Post # 13
Member
1292 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

Just an idea but I signed up for an art class at Michaels and I met some cool people… Also, I signed up for a few meet-ups on that well known meetup website. I moved to a new city 3 years ago by myself, 5000+ miles away from family. I didn’t know a soul πŸ™‚ I, like you, just let people know I was new to the area and made a huge effort to get to know people πŸ™‚ It all worked out.

Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
1562 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

My Darling Husband and I just moved 200 miles so I could go to grad school.  I’m meeting some people at college, but not enough to really make friendships yet.  It’s really tough – especially getting out to bars.  Dh likes going to the Legion to swap war stories, but I hate being the youngest one there.  

I’m planning on trying to find volunteering or a church family soon.

Post # 15
Member
152 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’ve lived in Boise my entire life! You’ll love it here, where are you from? If you’re an outdoorsy person at all you’ll really appreciate this city. The foot hills are an awesome spot for running/walking/hiking/mountain biking, the river runs right through the town, and the local ski resort is only 30-60 minutes away depending on where you live.

Thanks to JR Simplot (our local millionaire who shipped potatoes during WWII) out of towners have the impression that there is nothing but potatoe farms here… But there are just about NO potato farms in Boise πŸ™‚ We’ve got about 600,000 people so we aren’t just a tiny farm town!

What part of Boise are you moving to?

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