- 4 months ago
So tomorrow, I’m moving in with my boyfriend for the first time. I have never left home with my parents, and I’m 28 years old. Yes, I know, I’m a little late on the train. I love my boyfriend very much, and I’m excited for this new chapter with him – we’ve been dating for 3.5 years and live an hour apart, so our time is limited with each other. I’m excited to see him more and merge our lives together. I know this is the right thing to do.. but I can’t help the way I’m feeling. I feel incrediably sad to leave my parents and the place I’ve called home the past 28 years. I’m moving an hour away, into a much smaller place, in a very small town. The past week as I’ve packed, I don’t think I’ve ever cried so much as I have. I hate when people ask about how my move is going, or if I’m ready, because I’m fighting back the tears. It’s not HIM, it’s leaving my parents that’s upsetting me. I feel SO childish thinking this way at such an old age. It just feels like the end of an era. Like I’m officially leaving my childhood behind.
I also have a dog here, whom I ADORE. He is so special to me. We’ve had a dog my entire life.. when one passed away, another would come home immediately. So I’ve never been without one. They quickly become part of our family. Since he is our ‘family dog’, he must stay back with my parents. This part wrecks me, because I know I’ll miss him terribly. We can’t get a dog in the place we are renting, so it’s going to be a while before I have another one. I don’t think that my work situation helps this cause either… A year ago, I left my job and went full time in my own business, so I’ve mainly been working from home for the past year. So I spend A LOT of time here.. with my parents, with my dog. I’m very comfortable here.
I’ll admit that if it wasn’t for my boyfriend, I probably would have no desire to leave. Things are easy here. I know my parents frontwards and back, and they know me. I know exactly what I’m coming home to, and I can finish the sentences out of my parent’s mouth. It’s very ‘safe’ here. I know it’s time. It’s time to grow, to push myself, and to throw myself into the real world and learn how to do this on my own. But I am absolutely terrified.
I’ve shared my concern a bit with my boyfriend, and he’s very supportive and said I can come home whenever I want to when I’m feeling homesick. But I don’t tell my parents much about it because I don’t want to upset them. I’m the last ‘out of the nest’ and I feel like they will be crushed when I leave.
Tomorrow came so soon. And I’m barely holding back the tears.
Please tell me this is somewhat normal, and that I’ll get adjusted soon.