Post # 1
Member
17 posts
Newbee
Hey Bees,
This is actually my first post here, although I’ve been reading the boards for a month or two! My Fiance and I have been dating a little over 4 years and we got engaged in December. At first, we had talked about getting married in a short timeframe (like 9 mos) because we are both in stable positions–out of college and have good jobs. However, he has started to doubt his job and so we were thinking about going a year out just to try to give him more time and start our marriage off right!
Anyway, we decided that we didn’t want to get married in Dec-Jan because of holidays, weather, etc. His family didn’t want to see people trying to get in during a big snow. (I live in Indiana). We finally chose March 5th because we can’t get married during Lent, so this is the last Saturday before that starts. Now, his parents are mad and think we aren’t thinking about his family! Ah! We pushed it back for other people and they didn’t even care. We only have a few guests that’ll have to fly in, my brother included. But, I also think that they will fly in the day before anyway for the rehearsal and I know my brother would drive 16 hours to be there if he had to. Why should I have to push the wedding back 6 more weeks just because the weather might be bad?
I don’t think I’m a stubborn person or bridezilla! I have always wanted to just enjoy wedding planning, but it’s hard when people just complain. Am I insane?! Help!
Post # 3
Member
250 posts
Helper bee
oh honey, let me just give you some sound advice.
The opinions and suggestions come out of the woodwork. I have NEVER been as “amazed” with things being said or not being done as I have the last 18 months during the wedding planning with my daughter.
Trust me, DO WHAT YOU WANT, DO WHAT MAKES YOU and FIANCE HAPPY~ and just remember this, “It is not all the little Battles you win, it is winning the war in the end”
Let some things be “won” by the parents/inlaws and SAVE THE BIGGIES for yourself to have victory. Weigh out the important things and stick to your guns!
Post # 4
Member
3539 posts
Sugar bee
just keep in mind during the whole wedding planning is that you cant please everyone!
I had just sent our save the dates and my aunty asked if we could change the date? i was like.. hmm 100 of those things went out… umm no. She was ok about it. Sometimes people dont think. I dont think your being unreasonable…Just say you have changed it soo many times already and that you just really want to get married and thats the best week with budgets and other people. Hang in there.
p.s welcome to the hive!
Post # 5
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
I agree with the other ladies. You can’t please everyone no matter what you do. As long as it works for you and your Fiance that’s all that matters. When the wedding is over it’s just the two of you. Good Luck 😉
Post # 6
Member
5822 posts
Bee Keeper
@ccranetobe: LOL @ your auntie!! “Can you change the date” LOL after she received a STD. That is just cracking me up!!
@rcool487: There will always be something that people want you to change. You have to decide whether or not it’s that important to you to keep your decision, or if their requests really do make sense. It sounds like in this case you should stick to your decision. I can come up with a reason for you to move your date no matter what date you pick, they’re just being…picky, LOL.
Post # 7
Member
1565 posts
Bumble bee
We had to move our date around a lot for family (mostly mine). They had legit reasons for certain seasons and weeks not working for someone – jobs, school, health, etc. Future Mother-In-Law was unhappy with our date because of Labor Day traffic. We decided that wasn’t a good reason for us to move the wedding, so we stood our ground there. So I would say, it’s good to be flexible if someone has a good reason for their request, but if doesn’t make sense to you and Fiance, then stand your ground.
Post # 8
Member
17 posts
Newbee
Thanks! I think I’ll try to stand my ground on this one. I mean, in the midwest, you never know what you’ll get with the weather. Everyone has reasons why we should change the date–either up or back. My parents thought that it’d be sooner because my grandfather is old and not 100% health, but you can’t plan everything. We’re doing it when we feel comfortable and happy! I just hope his mom doesn’t make it too unhappy for Fiance to be excited. 🙂
Thanks a bunch, girls! You made me feel better!
Member