(Closed) Moving to a different state

posted 6 years ago in Home
Post # 3
Member
945 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I don’t, but I’m commenting so I remember to come back later. I’ll be moving away from where I’ve always lived this summer and am looking for the same kind of guidance

Post # 4
Member
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I moved away from home after I graduated from high school and never looked back, and moved to a different city after college too. I see my parents about four times a year. I love my parents, but I love them much more when I don’t see them all the time. It makes the time we have together more special.

if you are very close to your family it may be harder. I was always very independent. The only time I ever feel sad is when I say goodbye to them at the end of a visit. Other then that it doesn’t bother me.

My Fiance has lived his entire adult life within 15 minutes of the home he grew up in, and we see his family about once a week. I like them, but I generally find that much family time exhausting!

Post # 5
Member
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I moved away from home, about 7 hours away.

It has been difficult because most of my family doesn’t like to talk on the phone. It’s also hard when there are nieces/nephews. I like spending time with my niece but she’s 3 so can’t talk on the phone for a few years yet. And they make me feel like I abandoned them, so lots of guilt.

It’s also hard because there are so many little moments that you miss. If your mom buys too many tomatoes or wants to borrow a movie or a cake pan, if you and your sister like to go shoe shopping, if you spend fridays having lunch with friends, etc. I miss all those things. Facebook helps a little but I am homesick most of the time and it sucks.

The other thing that is terrble is holidays.  Every year I have to decide how to split the time, or who to see, and I will always miss seeing someone, and feel terrible and guilty about it.

Post # 7
Member
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I’ve moved around a lot. When I left home I moved to a different island for Uni, and now live in Asia (I’m from NZ). I’ve also done a short stint working in Germany, and will be moving to north America next year.

Skype is a wonderful invention. I use it most days.

Join something to meet people – a club, class, religious organization, sports team etc. http://www.meetup.com is good.

Beware of cultural fatigue (shock). You don’t need a passport to be in a different culture – my worst experience of this was moving 2 hours away in new Zealand. If you read up and prepare it’s easier to deal with. It doesn’t always happen, but better to be prepared.

Try to leave once in a while. I aim to leave japan about twice a year (in the US you can go to another state!). I find after a few days I miss Japan. I come back with fresh eyes and a new love for Japan.

I used to go home about 3 times a year. Now way less often. NZ is very isolated and far. I last went back for christmas and will go back for Christmas 2014. My situation is different though, due to coming from an isolated nation.

Go for it! You will learn heaps and get a much better understanding of different perspectives and the world!

Post # 8
Member
1002 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I  might be moving across the country in December, and I created a thread on this topic a little while ago, if you want to look at it to get some more answers 🙂

I think as long as you visit at least once or twice a year, and skype/phone often, it would be OK.

Post # 9
Member
284 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

My husband and I just moved to CO from IL.  We had lived in IL our whole lives.  Honestly it is hard.  The lifestyle is very different.  It is harder to make friends which is probably b/c I made friends from all my years at school back in IL.  Luckily my parents moved to CO about an hour away from us.  I do miss all of my friends, but we have been back visiting 2 times the last 5/6 months.  We like the change of scenery.  I think it just takes time to get used to a place and develop friendships.  I am happy we moved though.  We really wanted to make a change.  The way we thought of it was we had nothing holding us to IL (we rented, had no kids, and were ready to try for new jobs).  We also knew it would be easier to move to a new place before we had kids.  Just make sure you are both ready and willing to move b/c you will be each other’s only friends for a bit and have to support each other through the changes.  

Post # 10
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I live in Florida and I hate it here (moved here when I was 6 from Illinois) and my husband and I are planning on a move up north. My husband is originally from New Jersey and has lived in New York and he wants to go back up to that area. I think we’re actually seriously looking into Baltimore though as I don’t want to live in New York and I think New Jersey does not offer what we’re looking for. Even though I know for us it’s going to be extremely scary, and a huge adjustment with lots of speed bumps, I know it will be worth it in the end when I’m living somewhere that I feel happy and comfortable. While there are plenty of things about Florida that I will miss, and for now my father and grandmother are still here (my mom is actually most likely also moving to Baltimore), I know that it will prove worth it in the end since Florida is not really where I want to raise children and grow old. 

Just a little perspective from someone who also lives in Florida. 

Post # 11
Member
10366 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

I moved from Dallas/Ft Worth TX to Galveston TX for college, then Boston MA for grad school and now the San Fran Bay Area for a job. I don’t regret leaving for a second. I think that type of challenge is really important, and stretches you as a person, and really opens new opportunities. There’s skype and airplanes to visit family – youre never far away!

Post # 12
Member
1038 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I left Louisiana(THANK GOD)  7 years ago and it was the best decision I’ve ever made.  I’m sooo much happier here in AZ and I have NO DESIRE WHATSOEVER to EVER move back to the South.  Hell, after just 3 days in LA visiting friends and family I’m quickly reminded of why I got the hell out of that backwoods state.

Most of my friends and family still live in LA(poor them) and while I miss being closer to them, I love my sanity and happiness more.  I go home usually once a year or every other year.  I talk to my parents maybe once a month.  I love them and all, but we were never a superclose family.  I get along much better with them now that there is 1400 miles between us to be honest, lol.

 

 

It is your life, don’t be guilted by family and friends to live someplace you aren’t happy in just to be near them. 

Post # 13
Hostess
3571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I went to grad school abroad, moved back to the US about 8 hours from my family, and then went abroad again. I’ve basically been gone since 2008. I’m very close with my family, but I don’t really miss them. I talk to them a lot on the phone and skype and stuff. 

Plus, I think I like my family a lot more from a distance. They don’t necessarily all have the healthiest dynamics and I don’t participate. I like having the space to live my life the way that Darling Husband and I choose.  To me, it’s sort of the best of both worlds.

Post # 14
Member
1359 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I grew up in NC and I moved to Kansas City for 2.5 years for college. I did miss my family a lot – saw them probably 4 times a year or so and it was hard to leave again. That was part of why I transferred to a closer college, in GA. Now, I don’t think I see them THAT much more, but it’s easier because I know if I need to it’s just a medium drive instead of a plane flight. For instance, when my dog was dying, my brother drove down on a school night to say goodbye. I’ve taken spontaneous weekend trips up there, etc.

Right now I’m okay with the amount of distance we have, though I do miss them, but I know that as we get older, have kids, and so on I want to be much closer to everyone. Hopefully we all pick up and move somewhere else though because I’m tired of the south. : )

Post # 15
Member
3552 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I moved from the Milwaukee area to the Twin cities which is about a 6 and a half hour drive for college. I was pretty homesick my freshman year, but I also came to realize that I get along with my mother a lot better at a distance. After four years of long distance my SO (we met in highschool) moved up here to be with me. He’s struggling with the distance from his family because he’s never not been able to go home for the weekend. His sister just had his niece and we will not be able to go home to see the baby before she goes back to NC which is dissapointing. Someday we would love to move back to WI, but it may not be possible because of the industry that I am in.

Post # 16
Member
13096 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I grew up in Indiana and moved away to Atlanta, GA for college.  Then I took a job in Los Angeles, then transfered to their office in Dallas, TX and now have a new job that brought Darling Husband and I back the Atlanta.

I see my parents around 3-4 times a year and talk on the phone all the time.  It really doesn’t feel that far away.  (But I am glad that they will be retiring to south GA because I’ll love having them a bit closer when Darling Husband and I have kids).

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