Post # 1
- Wedding: November 2019 - City, State
Just curious if any other bees on here have opinions or thoughts about this.
I love my FH’s parents – they’re really wonderful, helpful people and I get along with them very well. But for some reason I’m finding it really hard to keep calling them “Mr. and Mrs. Sxxxxx.” My parents introduced themselves to my FH with their first names, and all of my parents good friends insist that I call them by their first names. I’m 31, so I think it feels weird to them for me to continue to call them “Mr./Mrs.” like I did when I was a kid. FH’s parents are the only ones in my life who still insist on being called by the formal titles. I also think it’s a little weird to continue calling them that after we get married, because…well, then I will be “Mrs. Sxxxxx.”
So out of pure curiosity…what do you call your in-laws?
Post # 2
I go back and forth between her first name and calling her mama (the Russian way to say mom) depends on the situation and how lovey I am feeling. Father in law passed away five weeks before the wedding so I never got a chance to call him papa.
I find it strange they insist their daughter in law calls them by such formal names. Like you are a stranger.
Post # 3
I call them by the first names or Granny and Grandpa if we are with our son. It would seem weird to me to call them by their formal titles.
Post # 4
hickoryhills : First names unless we’re with my daughter and then it’s Oma and Opa. But if they preferred something else I’d use what they asked me.
Post # 5
When I was young in my first marriage it was mr. And Mrs for a long time. Eventually I called her mama first name.
Now that I’m 31 and headed toward my second marriage it is first names only.
Are they specifically asking you to call them by their formal titles or that’s just how they introduced themselves to you?
What do other adults call them?
If they are always known formally, then I’d probably respect their wishes until having a kid, then they’d be grandma and grandpa.
0therwise, I’d wait for a casual moment and ask what they would be preferred to be called after the wedding. That will give them the opportunity to rethink in a polite way.
Post # 6
When I met my in-laws they said “call me First Name” and “call me First Name” so it was easy. His stepfather wanted me to call him dad but I was like “no” lol so I call him by his first name like my fiance does. No one’s had a problem with that!
Post # 7
I’ve always called my FH’s parents Mr/Mrs out of respect and personally will until they ask me to call them by their first name. My mom from the very beginning told my FH to call her by her first name. My FH always says I can call his parents by their first name, but I was raised to always call people by their formal title unless they say otherwise.
Granted it will be strange when we get married and both his mother and I will be Mrs. Xxxxxx so hopefully she will tell me to call her by her first name by then lol.
Post # 8
- Wedding: February 2018 - UK
I’ve been with my husband over 6 years, and I still don’t know what to call his mum! It’s got to the point where it’s been too long to ask now, and she doesn’t seem to know either – she signs my birthday cards “from N’s mum”…
Post # 9
I call my in-laws Mom and Dad or Memaw and Papa depending on if we are around my husbands nieces and nephew or not. I’ll use their first names if I’m talking about them to other people.
Post # 10
- Wedding: October 2018 - NC
My fiance’s parents told me when I first met them to call them by their first names. They were almost offended when I tried to call them Mr and Mrs Xxxx! My mother, however, still expects my fiance to call her Mrs. Xxxxx.
My parents are divorced now, but even during their 27-year marriage, they called their inlaws Mr and Mrs. Xxxxx.
Post # 11
I call my future in laws by their first names. That’s what They introduced themselves to me as, I would have found it incredibly difficult to call them Mr and Mrs. I’m not a very formal person and I don’t come from a very formal family, we call aunts and uncles by their first names not uncle or aunt. My nephews call me by my first name not Auntie.
Its not that I don’t know the formalities and what’s expected as respectful, I was taught that, and when introduced to adults as a child I first called them Mr and Mrs, unless introduced differently, but then it was never used in my family.
Post # 12
My FHs parents insisted on first names and my parents did the same.
Post # 13
Believe it or not I’ve been with Darling Husband for 6 years, married 3 months, and have managed to avoid calling my in laws anything ever. At first I felt weird calling them by their first names and then it had been so long I didn’t know how to just start. If I’m speaking about fil to mil or vice versa I’ll say “your husband/wife”. Lol I really need to sort this out. We are very close other wise and she will sign our cards mom/dad.
Post # 14
They insist on being called Mr and Mrs?? That’s super weird lol
I honestly don’t think I know anyone who refers to their in-laws as Mr and Mrs.
Post # 15
They have actually asked me to call them by their first name, but I can’t help but call the Mr./Mrs. in their presence! It was just the way I was raised! I still call all my friend’s parents Mr./Mrs. It is just a sign of respect.