Post # 1
I am no longer waiting…
…There I said it
*This is long*
Ladies I have trolling this board over the last four years and a couple of months ago, June to be exact Corn says we will get married 7/01/11 in Chicago (without a ring he wanted to have Little Corn involved in the “official proposal). We even checked out a venue in downtown Chicago. I called up my bestfriend – for the third time (more on this later) – and got her pumped cause she would have to help me even if she is in South Carolina. I called my mom and was just so psyched!
THIS TIME IT IS REAL……I know it he looked at the suits and colors I sent him and we decided on Navy, Yellow with touches of Silver and Green for our wedding colors. We looked over the food menu and decided surf and turf would be great for our guests and would be in the budget since we would have maybe 75 ppl tops. We scoped out the adjacent parking lot of the venue because with a venu like that right off the Chicago River we would have to pay for our guests parking who lived in-town. I purchased our ‘I DO’ letters, the bird cage and 20 18′ effil tower vases to begin putting the vision into motion.
In September I noticed that he was becoming distant and understandably so, due to his ex-wife and a child custody case. But we talked and said we can balance life and still handle the issue that lay before him. *smile* In November I asked him about the venue and getting a deposit in to them because the date would be here before we knew it.
He said, “I AM NOT WORRIED ABOUT A WEDDING I AM GOING THROUGH SOMETHING RIGHT NOW!”
Yes he did.
I figured I would back off and just continue planning and whatever venue we end up with would suffice because no matter what it is about us and the love we decide to share together forever. But Christmas will be here soon…..atleast I will get my ring.
Christmas came around and Little Corn had been on a cruie with his mom and was expected back the day after Christmas. Corn says we have one more gift for you but it has to wait until he is back because that’s when we all will open gifts.
Little Corn is excited about his gifts and rips through them, his dad goes into the bedroom and Little Corn comes back out with a box and drops to his knee….and opens the box.
Its a necklace….Little Corn sayd “Dad where is the ring, what happened?”
I immediately changed the subject cried a little and decided to say screw this, I don’t marry someone like him. Here I am six years later in a future-less relationship saying he can no longer fool me!
Post # 3
Yikes. I’m so sorry. I don’t have any advice really, but ouchie.
Post # 4
No advice needed, just felt good to vent
Post # 5
Wait, so you guys got engaged without the ring, then he didn’t give you the ring when you were expecting him to, but you guys are still planning the wedding, but now you’re not because he didn’t give you the ring? I’m confused. Did you guys talk about it?
Post # 6
So are you breaking up with him then or resolving yourself to a relationship without marriage? I’m so sorry. What an aweful tihng to happen.
Post # 7
I’m sorry about that. *Hugs*
Post # 8
Wow…I am so sorry that you are going through all of this.
Post # 9
I am so sorry about all this.
All I can say is *hugs*
Do you two ever talk about what happened?
Post # 10
I am ending the relationship in general. This is not the first time he “intended to marry me” and we set a date, this is the THIRD time. For some reason I ACTUALLY believed it this time though because he actually showed interest and had some input…… I am ending our relationship because I can no longer settle and refuse to succumb to being some type of begging woman to a man who isn’t worthy of me and doesn’t want more than what it is now. Full-time live in girlfriend who assists in raising his son who lives there 24/7 and I do love to death since being in his life for the past six years I have grown alot. He claims I am a good woman and wants to stay with me, but not a good enough woman for you to marry? Our relationship lasted longer than his first marriage……ending it for a ring is just ri-danm-duclous -I am not big on rings or jewery in general at all so that was NEVER a factor, I would take a ringpop anyday.
Post # 11
@BrideofCorn: Have you talked to him about his hangups? Maybe a full blown wedding isn’t right, would he be willing to do a JOP ceremony so you could be husband & wife with out all the hulabaloo? Or is he just unwilling to actually marry you?
*big hugs* to you and stay strong
Post # 12
So he said he wanted to marry you, but told you he wasn’t worried about the wedding because he was going through something else? Also he said he wanted to wait on the ring until baby corn was with you?
Post # 13
I’m confused. He even told his son he was proposing and then changed his mind at the last minute?
And what guy gets down on one knee (especially when he KNOWS his gf is expecting a proposal with a box containing a necklace? That almost sounds intentionally cruel.
Post # 14
We have been together for six years, living together for six years, raising his son together for six years and talked until we are blue in the face. Around year four is when we first discussed getting married….it didn’t happend…..year five we decided to get married….it didn’t happen….year 6 here we are and he has too many other issues to worry about a marriage. But what makes me angry is that I understand people have issues that life will toss at you and you must handle but there is also life that should be lived through those trials stop using them as an excuse (he has a new issue every year) and either live your life or be truthful with me being in your life begging for ours to begin and tell me you don’t have time for a relationship in general. Outside of the marriage topic that’s suffering too………
Post # 15
@BrideofCorn: I commend you for being so strong. Esp being in the relationship for 6yrs and having that amazing attachment to his son. This can’t be easy.
Post # 16
@BrideofCorn: oh I see. Good for you for standing up for yourself! I’m sorry to hear you had to go through this, but it’s all upwards from here, right?