- 4 years ago
- Wedding: July 2015
Ugh I should have known that my aunt would try to turn my birthday into something that is all about her and her daughter! Here is the story, it is mostly a vent but please share any insights you may have 🙂
This year is the big one, I am turning 21! YAY… originally I planned on having a low key birthday at home so that I could spend it with my FI who will not be 21 for another 4 months. Well after many long discussions with my FI, sister and mother; I have decided to turn my low key birthday into a four day trip to Vegas with my mom, sister, my godmother, and a friend. FI wants me to have fun and I finally agreed and although I wasn’t really into going to Vegas a few months ago I am now counting down the days and cannot wait for my all ladies trip with the women I love. We plan on mostly gambling and sleeping, and some sightseeing and laying out by the pool for the day and partying it up at night, we are clubbing, going to Thunder Down Under, hopping aboard a party bus and of course lots of drinking. This screams 21st birthday…right???
Well my aunt who does not have a party bone in her body and has known about the trip for a month now has all of sudden, 5 days before we leave, become very hurt that she was not invited (no one was actually invited, it was more of this is when we are going you can come if you want kind of thing) Anyways my mom tells her that we can comfortably fit one more person in our car (technically it can fit 3 more people but it’s a 12 hour drive and would be very crammed) and hotel rooms so she is welcome to come, I really don’t want her to come but whatever I will deal with it, I think maybe we can get her to let loose a little. Well this is the following text she sent my mother and just for clarification Jamie is 16 years old.
“O so you can still fit 2 more??? I can bring Jamie plus one”
UM…. NO! First I didn’t want anyone else coming on this trip, second it would be so uncomfortable and third I do not want to have to worry about finding things to do that my cousin can come to. This is supposed to be a let loose and party 21st birthday, if it was for underage people my FI would be coming. My mom explains that this is an adult trip for me but my aunt just ignores her and says Jamie can swim and just hang out and that she is having a really hard time because her friends, boyfriend and 23 year old sister keep ditching her (this is because she is a spoiled brat/party pooper). My thought is then why take her on a trip where we are constantly going to be “ditching” her so that we can do over 21 stuff? My aunt continues saying that if my mom makes it so that Jamie can be included she would be the bestest aunty ever, I really don’t mean to sound selfish and spoiled too but this trip is for me and mom is trying to be the best mommy in the world and mommy trumps aunty!
My mom finished the convo by stating that if my aunt would like to come she is welcome to ride and stay with us but if she brings Jamie and friend then she will have to drive herself and get her own room and that she needs to know that we will keep our plans and include them when we can (i.e. laying out by the pool, eating and the occasional site seeing)
Aunt has not texted back yet but I have to see her and my cousin on Friday for my birthday dinner with the family, and I know she is going to make me feel like crap for not including my cousin. This whole situation wouldn’t even bug me so much if this didn’t always happen, it isn’t my fault my cousin is much younger than the rest of us we include her as often as possible but it’s nice to do age appropriate activities every so often. I feel terrible because now I feel selfish for not trying to include her but I’m also mad because I feel I shouldn’t have to worry about her on my birthday. I just don’t know how to feel, what to do or what to say…. Advice?