(Closed) My bachelorette is costing $175 per person!?!?!?

posted 6 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I would assume people who don’t want to pay that $$ or aren’t interested in the activities (I would not be) just won’t go.  You should stay out of it.

Post # 4
Member
47458 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
MeandMyLouboutins:  Seems pretty straight forward.  Tell your Maid/Matron of Honor you want a local bachelorette- dinner, drinks, done.

Post # 6
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I also ran into a similar issue with my bachelorette party. Originally had wanted to go to Nashville (I live in Michigan, guests from Indiana, Illinois, Wisconsin, Minnesota, South Carolina and Washington) but realized it was going to be too expensive for my guests so I told my MOH/sister that I wanted to do something local instead. But she contacted everyone on my guest list, without my knowledge, and planned the Nashville trip anyways. She got a rental house and is working on the other details. It will probably cost everyone $150 for the house and activities plus spending money and travel costs.

<br />I was pleasantly surprised to see that almost everyone on my guest list RSVP’d yes and has purchased a shirt for the event.

<br />I think you should stay out of it and the people that want/can afford to come will attend. Try to enjoy it.<br />

Post # 7
Member
2505 posts
Sugar bee

Definitely nix the t-shirt. I’m guessing it’d be the one and only time they’d even wear it. Maybe go for something else they all already have like little black dresses or something if you want to coordinate but I’d just let them wear what they want.

Personally I would, and have, turned down pole dancing classes for bach. parties. I’m sure they’re fun, just not my thing and not worth paying for.

Post # 8
Member
389 posts
Helper bee

Is part of that cost per person meant to cover the cost for you to attend as well?  It’s annoying, since you have so many other expenses with the wedding, but could you offer to pay your portion? Otherwise, I would just contact your Maid/Matron of Honor and say that while she may have sent you the invitation by accident, you’ve now seen it and you think that this is still an unreasonable amount of money to expect your guests to pay.  The bachelorette is supposed to be about you, so you shoudn’t be made to feel uncomfortable about it because of her plans.

Post # 9
Member
47458 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Ditch the pole dancing and t shirt.

Post # 10
Member
1663 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m guessing your Maid/Matron of Honor is your closest, dearest friend, so I would tell her you saw the evite and you don’t want guests to spend that much. Be honest with her!

Post # 11
Member
1403 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

I would not do pole dancing or wear a bachelorette t-shirt, even if they were free.  Not sure why the rest of the bridal party isn’t speaking up to your Maid/Matron of Honor, but it’s not your job to do so.

Post # 12
Member
1754 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

If she forwarded the evite to you, at some point she will probably realize she did so (if she hasn’t already).

I would just be honest with her that you saw it and would like to cut the shirts and the class. Tell her you want it to be more low-key!

Post # 13
Member
2453 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

Could you consider dropping the limo and t-shirt?

How interested in the pole dancing class are your girls?  It’s not something I’d be wanting to do.

Post # 14
Member
832 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

View original reply
MeandMyLouboutins:  I would approach her directly and be honest about it. She’s your Maid/Matron of Honor which would mean the two of you are really close and she’d be someone you can talk to about anything. Preface it by saying that you know she wants to give you an unforgettable experience but you saw the email and feel that it’s too much. I’d ask her to cancel the T-shirt, shop around for a lower price on the limo and change the restaurant to somewhere more affordable as well. I’d talk to her ASAP as well, just in case she starts to make any non-refundable deposits on some of these items.

Post # 15
Member
3031 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

Pole dancing classes are a lot of fun! However… when i hosted that kind of party for a friend, it cost about $25/person for the private class. There’s no way they need t-shirts… And a limo seems extravagent to me. 

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