- This Time Round
- 6 years ago
- Wedding: December 2012
Personally, as an Older Bee who has seen a lot of life, I think this is Less About your Friend, and more about You
And the Moral Dilemma that YOU FACE
You cannot dictate what moral compass your Girlfriend “chooses” to live by
And for the record, I disagree with the Bees that said the “guilty party” is all the man that is stepping out on his wife. When someone knowingly date someone who is “committed” to someone else (legally or otherwise) they are also doing something morally irresponsible.
Which is WHY according to the Bible (for those who might be religious) that Adultry is a sin commited BY TWO and not just one. An adultress can be a woman married and cheating on her Husband, OR can be the “mistress” of a Man who is married and she is cheating with him on his spouse.
Amazingly some people, when they are the “mistress” somehow believe that they are in a NO FAULT position (morally) as they aren’t the one who is married.
Probably WHY your friend cannot see what you see in this situation (in so much as well that you yourself are married)
Personally, I understand the dilemma… for me it would be same… trying to disconnect MY Moral Compass from theirs
In reality, I cannot be one who goes along like nothing has changed… because it has
Altho like other Bees suggested I may try for a spell to make the friendship work:
“Sorry Sue, but I cannot talk with you about Mr Bob… as that is far too upsetting for me and outside of what I believe is right and proper behaviour as a Married person when one takes a lifelong vow to LOVE & HONOUR the other person. So we will have to make an agreement NOT TO TALK about this issue, or I will have to limit my exposure to you”
Then if she persists, you “Wish Her Well” but cut off the contact as you stated
The only other choice, is you weigh all this now, and cut ties immediately.
Whether you reconnect later down the road again, well I suppose that would depend on WHERE she is in her life and the journey she makes within it.
In truth, I feel bad for your friend… obviously she has some major self esteem issues if she feels that her being involved with someone else’s Husband and a “protracted” relationship is better than going out and finding an available man who could offer her so much more (including INTEGRITY)
Her head isn’t screwed on straight right now… she’s lost her way… and that is sad.
I hope this helps you in your moral dilemma / struggle on what to do with the info you have at hand…
(( HUGS ))