(Closed) My best friend’s fiance cheated on her at his bachelor party!

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 182
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

If my fiance did that, I wish someone would tell me right away!  If he’s capable of doing something like this at that point of time…you never know later on. 

Post # 183
919 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

im avoiding the whole situation and we are having a meet up at the strip club. i do trust my fi but im not to crazy about his single guy friends…

Post # 185
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

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@Ticktock: I cant believe she married him…jeez

Post # 186
1058 posts
Bumble bee

Sorry your friend is just setting herself up for more hurt. What happens when one of Doug’s buddies gets engaged and he goes to his buddies bachelor party at a strip club and Doug gets soo drunk that he ends up in the private room again?

I’m sure the trust is gone in that relationship and I’m pretty sure their marriage won’t last. Hopefully he learned from his mistake and will strive to make her happy, be faithful and be a better man, but one can only hope for your friends sake.

So sad. 🙁

Post # 187
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

the first problem was telling her guy he wasn’t allowed to go to the club. that just makes them want to do it more!

Post # 188
1 posts

i don’t know if i should write this…i’m a guy and i’m crying right now and deserve it

i had a similar story except i’m the groom…i definetely did not go as far as fingering or sucking but did touch some areas

i had been with my gf for 6 years. never would have thought i would be capable of doing something like this and i felt so bad about it a couple of days after the bachelor i told her…that was last night

i broke her heart and i dont know what to do. the wedding was to be in less than 3 weeks. i didnt want to hold on to that for the rest of my life with her and i didnt want to wait to tell her until after.

i’m scum

i just want to turn back the clock and wished i had never drank…its not an excuse but i wouldnt have gone that far.

thats not me

Post # 189
1058 posts
Bumble bee

@stupidguy: That sucks, what I don’t understand is why guys feel it’s ok to interact with strippers or go to a strip club even if it is a bachelor party.

Interactions like this is cheating whether you think so or not. Now look what happened drinking + strippers is nothing but a disaster waiting to happen. Why don’t guys think about the possibilities before putting themselves in compromising situations?!?!

I feel horrible for your fiancé. What a horrible thing to find out before you say “I do” as bad as this is at least you were honest and your honesty will probably save your relationship.

However, I think that your days at strip clubs or your bachelor party days are over because if I were her and you were invited to a bachelor party that took place at a strip club or involved strippers in any way I would say absolutely not! Strippers are like diseases that’s what strippers are and definitely carry. Just like a disease they will eat your relationship right up until it’s gone.

Good luck though I wish you both the best.

Post # 190
310 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I know this is somewhat an old thread. But after reading the WHOLE thing. WOW. So how was April? (sorry I needed the closure) 

and what’s up with “stupid guy” pretty random.

Post # 191
1202 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I haven’t read all responses and know this is an old thread but saw it linked in another.. I have to say…..


Tina knows her Fiance can’t be trusted. She came up with a lie to explain why her bachelorette party showed up at his so she’s not 100% honest with him either. She called him throughout the night to check up on him during his party. Why is she marrying this guy???

She is clearly aware that he is up to no good and has done nothing about it. I think your getting involved will probably backfire.


It is a shame, but this marriage probably won’t last. His friends commenting on her age (30 is NOT old!) is something they are probably repeating what he’s said.. that he can get away with anything because she won’t leave him because he’s 25 and she is an old maid at 30 (I WISH I was 30 LOL!)….

Sadly you really can’t win in this situation:(

Post # 192
4753 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

You can’t tell.

I’m sorry you’re in this position but 2 things are wrong here. Your bf should NOT have told you. Now you are in this position. If you do tell you have just disrespected your bf in every way. You have also just sucessfully ended his relationship with his friend and that would be all your fault.

I don’t have much advice for you in terms of what TO do but what NOT to do is don’t tell.

Post # 193
546 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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@roxy821: Huhh? I live in MA and we have private rooms over here? Maybe its a town law or something?

Post # 196
1 posts

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Ticktock:  omg I swear we could be talking about the same people. I decided to not tell only because she did a similar thing at her party so it was a whole bunch of mess my bf and I decided to not get involved in. We have distanced ourselves from them and have sworn when we get married we would never put each other through that horror ever. 

Yep a joint bowling party is enough for us. Has put us off entirely on bachelor/bachalorette parties. 

Would be great to find out what you ended up doing? I know it’s an old thread but be interesting to know what path everyone ended up going down.

Post # 194
1135 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Omg this was 5 years ago totally dying for an update!

Post # 195
1065 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

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Ticktock:  i wouldnt tell.

I was in a similar position before where the groom did things at the strip club which were borderline cheating, and my Fiance felt upset and told me because he was a groomsman and felt responsible (they had tried to take the groom home and ended up having a fight with him because he wouldnt listen to them until eventually one of the older wives went and picked them all up) 

I agonised about telling her, but in the end didnt for various reasons: 

– i promised Fiance id keep his secret and it was not mine to tell. I want him to always be able to be honest with me without fear of retribution

-at the end of the day, although i trust my fi, it is gossip.  Theyd all been drinking and at the end of the day i dont know the real story. Hell, Fiance could have made the whole thing up to cover for himself because his friends were trying to get him out of there (not that i think that is even a possibility, but i cant prove it either way)

– i dont know what has been discussed behind closed doors in their relationship. She may already know abd have forgiven him, someine else may have told her, she may not want to know but suspected something, she may have been okay with it etc.

Now if i saw for myself a friends SO do something innapropriate, my sureness would cancel out anything else and i would ceel obligated to say.  But as a rule, i try not to spread second hand information no matter what the content. 


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