(Closed) My bf HATES my parakeets, what am I supposed to do? :(

posted 6 years ago in Family
  • poll: Would you give away birds if your bf hates them?



  • Post # 2
    1403 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    No, I would not get rid of my pets. 

    Post # 3
    832 posts
    Busy bee

    Ahhh your poor feathered friends 🙁 Do you have a basement or spare room they could live in? Or a loud fan to put in their room to try to drown out the sound. I could never live without pets!!! I’d try a few more things first to separate SO From your birds before I just gave them away. He should respect you can commit to living things 😉

    Post # 4
    3529 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2015

    View original reply
    sylwia212:  I would never get rid of my pets for someone; they are your children!  Is there anywhere you can put them that they wouldn’t be in the same room with him?

    Post # 5
    3031 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

    Are there any other options to help quiet them duing the day when he is home?

    Blanket over their cage so they think it’s bedtime?

    Move them to a more remote location in the house? 

    Listen to music while your boyfriend is relaxing? maybe with headphones?


    You may have to choose between your boyfriend and your birds. How serious are you about this relationship? Do you want him to move back out? Do you want to get married? Do you know anyone (friend/famiy) who would be interested in your birds?

    Post # 6
    1892 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    They were there before your boyfriend. I would tell him to either suck it up bc they are staying, or he can find his own place or switch shifts at work.

    Post # 7
    656 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I think there is a big difference between getting rid of a pet for a significant other due to say allergies, aggression issues, etc, vs “I hate them, I can’t handle them, etc”. In the “hate” instance- too bad. They were here before you were, they are my responsibility, and if you don’t like it, don’t be there. I would never get rid of MY pets for someone for such a ridiculous reason, especially when they’ve been with me for so long and mean so much to me. My husband dislikes cats, but took mine in with me knowing how much they mean to me. He would NEVER even indirectly ask me to get rid of them.

    And while you say it won’t break their hearts- birds are known to become attach to an owner, and have trouble bonding again. 

    Post # 8
    664 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: December 1969

    No, I would not get rid of my animals unless it posed a risk to his health. And while I can understand his frustration (because I have 7 dogs and they can be super loud and annoying), he is not dealing well with this at all.

    Maybe you guys should think about living separately again, especially if you’re not planning on getting married any time soon.

    Post # 9
    3234 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    View original reply
    sylwia212:  I don’t give away pets and I despise people who do. Maybe your bf can help you pay for a bigger place where he and the birds will have more space from each other. But kids are loud and life is frustrating, so I’m not sure I’d want to be with someone who behaves like he is under stress. 

    Post # 10
    2908 posts
    Sugar bee

    Honestly, some people are very sensitive to sounds, and it seems like your BF might be one of those people. I do think that his mental health is just as important as the physical health of someone with an allergy to pet dander or whatever. I think his health (mental as well as physical) should be a priority in both your lives, and I think he would benefit from hearing that you feel for him.

    That said, if you love the birds, I don’t think you should re-home them.

    It seems to me that the best solution would be for him to either 1. not live with you and the birds or 2. work somewhere else so that he’s only home in the evenings when the birds are not so insistently loud.

    Post # 11
    375 posts
    Helper bee

    I would get rid of the boyfriend.

    If you treat your birds as family, you would not get rid of them for anyone. Keep that in mind. They have been there for you since before you were with your boyfriend.

    Also, pets are not dumb. Pets often get depressed when they are given up. They know. 

    I can’t respect people who give up pets.

    Post # 13
    498 posts
    Helper bee

    You made a commitment when you bought your pets. I might reconsider getting MORE birds later down the road, but what’s done is done and your BF needs to put his big-boy pants on and deal with it. I’m A huge animal lover as well, so the fact that your BF is so callous about your pets and unconcerned about what might happen to them if you were to give them away (or even mentioned it all!!) is alarming to me. I be more likely to get rid of BF than my pets, just sayinh lol 

    Post # 14
    729 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    sylwia212:  You made a life commitment to the parakeets. You and your bf have not made a life commitment to each other. It grosses me out that you’d even consider giving them away for him. It’s really easy to say you treat your pets like family, but if that’s actually how you feel you need to back it up with actions.

    Some suggestions: noise cancelling headphones (for him), more cleaning (for you), a bigger apartment so he has a “quiet” room to spend time away from the birds.

    Post # 15
    1770 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    Don’t get rid of your beloved animals just because someone who decided to move into YOUR home doesn’t love them like you do.  You made a promise to these birds that you would love them until they died.  If he doesn’t like it he can kick rocks.  You love your pets.  He should be able to tolerate them.

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