(Closed) My bff cancelled her wedding! Need advice!

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
314 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

First of all, I’m so sorry to hear about your BFF. I’m sure it was a difficult decision and she must be hurting massively right now.

A few ideas: If any of the vendors give you a hard time, ask if they will consider a full refund if they are able to rebook that date. I can understand their position from a business perspective, but I doubt most vendors are in the business of making money on canceled weddings if they can recoup the money elsewhere.

Also, if getting full refunds appears hopeless, are there any vendor services that you might be able to use in a different way? Maybe the vendors could “re-package” something for the price that’s already been paid out and use it as a pick-me-up for your BFF. For example, with catering – throw a small, intimate dinner for close friends; photographer – do a photo session with her closest girlfriends, or family portraits, or her pet dog (lots of people do this!).

Post # 4
1205 posts
Bumble bee

What a great friend you are!  I feel very sad for your BFF, I’m sure her decision was heartbreaking. 

I don’t have any legal advice, but I think the re-package idea is great.  Also, I wonder if the vendors would be willing to refund IF they got booked again for that date…  As in if you can sell this date, bff gets her (recoverable) $$.  Craigs list and or the WB local boards or classifieds might be helpful in just getting the word out that this vendor is now open for this date.

Good luck and Hugs for your bff.

Post # 5
14181 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I was always under the impression that the deposits were non-refundable but everything else was! As in, you don’t owe the full amount unless you utilize the full services?

Hopefully they will work with you. I’m sorry for your friend, that’s sucky =(

Post # 6
3997 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I’m sorry to hear your friend canceled her wedding.  I wrote about a canceled wedding a few weeks ago, its tough because you don’t know what to say or do.  Its great that you’re being so supportive.  I’m sure this is for the best .  But, as far as getting the money back, I think they’re out of luck!  So horrible.  My friend wasn’t able to get the deposits or the installments back, the only thing the vendors did offer (given the circumstances I think they felt bad) is that she could use their services at some other time.  So if she randomly threw a party she’ll have a DJ and photographer, and possibly the food.  Sorry again.

Post # 8
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

You are a great friend.  I’m sorry to hear that your friend is going through this, but I’m really glad you’re there to help.  Good luck with all the vendors.

Post # 9
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

That’s very nice that she has you to help her.  Good luck!

Post # 10
144 posts
Blushing bee

The above tips are good but don’t make one single call until you carefully review each contract.

You need to know she stands with each vendor before negotiations are possible.

Post # 11
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Hi Contrarymary, how did things turn out?  Were you able to get any of the money back?  How is your friend holding up?

Post # 13
5920 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

That’s a great idea – Bravo for taking something painful and turning it into something positive!

In the situation you are referring to, I think the groom cancelled the wedding, so the bride threw a Halloween bash for senior citizens, as her venue was near a nursing home. 

Post # 15
541 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

I think that it’s awesome that she is looking to turn her situation into a blessing for others and you are a wonderful friend.

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