My boyfriend does not care that I am coming out of college with student loans

posted 2 months ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
1052 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

I’ve never met anyone who didn’t have student loans at some point,  Don’t worry about it.  

Post # 4
Member
360 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

Neither me nor my husband had student loans, that said, I don’t think either of us would have excluded someone from marriage potential for having student loans. Now if someone had 6 figure loans and not a job that could afford payments that would be different.

Post # 5
Member
6035 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

WHAT? I cannot imagine not seeing a future with someone because they had student loans. Now, if they had several credit cards maxed because they had an addiction to expensive things they couldn’t afford, perhaps. But I’d venture a guess that most people have student loans upon graduation.

Post # 6
Member
3090 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

Your ex was a dickhead. Your boyfriend is not. Please don’t let emotional baggage from your last relationship affect this one. 

You have no reason to think your boyfriend is going to decide he doesn’t want you because you have reasonable debt. It’s not normal at all for a person to be judgmental about student loans. Your ex is not the norm. 

Post # 7
Member
9366 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

My husband had student loans when we graduated and I didn’t. I don’t care at all. He paid them off within 5 years of graduating, I wouldn’t have missed my amazing life with him because he had some debt from school.

Post # 8
Member
750 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

Very few people will care if you have modest student loans. Some people will care if you have large student loan debt (esp if they’re debt-free). Some people will care if you’re blonde, or short, anxious, shy, curvy, or if you have big feet.

The important thing is to get confident enough in who you are to accept that if someone doesn’t like you because if characteristics you can’t or don’t want to change, that’s too bad for them. 

Post # 9
Member
1030 posts
Bumble bee

Honestly, I wouldn’t date someone seriously who had 200k debt and a job prospect with only a salary of 60-80k for life. It isn’t my responsibility to take care of hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt because of someone else’s decision, especially if it is extremely burdensome. 

Your ex might have been a jerk, but it really depends on what kind of debt you have and what repayment schedule you will have. What kind of student loan amount are we talking about?

Post # 10
Member
421 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

My husband, who got his bachelors degree debt free after being in the Marines, married me knowing I have around 70K in student loans with interest that is skyrocketing. I was in my last semester when we got together. I think you should believe him when he says he doesn’t care. Most people who have a college degree have debt. These people still get married. If someone loves you, they don’t break up with you over student loan debt.  Your ex was an anamoly and a jerk. 

Post # 11
Member
2800 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

If he told you he isn’t worried, why are are you asking about this?

Most people have student loans, it’s not uncommon whatsoever. Your ex was an asshole, just trust what your current boyfriend is telling you.

basketballchick24 :  

Post # 12
Member
409 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Regardless of whether a partner will accept you, what is your own plan regarding these loans? Will you be able to get a high enough paying job with your degree after graduation to handle these loans? Some people come out of an expensive school deeply in debt and still unsure what they even want to do for work. Do you have a clear career path? How much debt are you talking about?

Post # 13
Member
493 posts
Helper bee

I agree w/ all previous posters above me. 

basketballchick24 :  Your ex was an ass – your current boyfriend is not so you shouldn’t worry too much about it…just trust what he says! 

Post # 14
Member
499 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2020 - Summer Camp!

mermaidbride79 :  I’m in the same circumstance, except my loans are higher. I have plans to do Public Service Loan Forgiveness to ease the burden though and decided that when I was trying to decide if grad school was for me. 

Post # 15
Member
755 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

My fiancé has student loans and I don’t care at all, he’ll pay them off a few years after we get married. As long as you have a plan it shouldn’t matter

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