(Closed) My boyfriend won't buy me a ring unless I buy him something in return…

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 121
Member
108 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

naturalflight:  yes this! My SO doesn’t buy me flowers because I don’t want flowers, Im awful for forgetting about them and just letting them die a painful death of dehydration. But he does buy little things that I do like, just because he wants to. I’m also with you on video games being a waste of money, but he likes them so I’ll buy him a video game just because it makes him happy. Therefore they can never truly be a waste of money. 

Post # 122
Member
5894 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

rimi09:  I agree with the other bees whir said there isn’t necessarily anything wrong with your SO or with you, but it sounds like you want different things. He doesn’t sound ready for marriage or partnership, first of all.  I think you have to give some thought to that.  do other aspects of the relationship make you think he’s worth waiting for?  Or are you starting to realize that this relationship is one that’s run its course?  If so, it’s time to go your separate ways and keep dating to find the right match.

Most people don’t (and shouldn’t!) marry their first boyfriend.  Each relationship is an opportunity to learn more about yourself.  This will help you on your journey toward finding the right partner.  

Good luck bee.  This is a time for soul searching. 

 

 

 

 

Post # 123
Member
1800 posts
Buzzing bee

rimi09:  are you afraid of dumping him because he’s your first real boyfriend? you do NOT have to settle for the first man who comes along!!

you say you’ve compromised so much already- you keep compromising and he doesn’t, is that fair? does that sound like “gender equality” to you?

he doesn’t want to buy you flowers because he says they’re useless and a waste of money- so he’s saying your happiness is a waste of money? seeing you smile is a waste of money?

to me it sounds like this “50/50 relationship” is more like housemates and he’s comfortable because you dont realize he’s taking advantage of you. Can you honestly say he does 50% of the cooking, cleaning, laundry? Do you orgasm in bed just as many times as he does? If you got pregnant, how is he going to contribute 50% to the 9month pregnancy? You give him a child, does he give you a new car?

Post # 124
Member
124 posts
Blushing bee

rimi09:  Yep, I thought for sure he’d be either a Virgo or a Capricorn. Virgos are score-keepers. I was married to one and dated three more. I personally would break it off otherwise I’d grow to resent him in the future. There are generous men out there and I don’t just mean money.

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