(Closed) My bridesmaid is going crazy!

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

sounds like she may have some mental issues going on

Post # 4
Member
322 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Oof, I’m so sorry. It really does sound like she has a lot of issues, and needs to really speak with someone. This may sound harsh, but I’d ignore some of her messages, and hope that she gets the hint. I’m certainly not saying to cut her out of your life, but you need to stop the onslaught, and if she’s getting attention from you in any way, she may not stop. 

At this point it sounds like she’s completely ignoring your requests (maybe even pleas!) It’s really difficult to be there for someone in this way when there’s something larger at play ๐Ÿ™ I’d say try to explain that there’s a lot going on in your life, but I’m not sure she’d be in a place to really understand. I’m sorry, and good luck!!

Post # 5
Member
2515 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

sounds like she has a mood disorder (and this is coming from someone who has a mood disorder). there’s nothing you can do if she won’t acknowledge it. you probably need to just start ignoring her and not returning her calls and messages (at least cut down on the amount you repsond to). if you don’t, it will drain you completely. the only other thing you could do is bluntly tell her you think she has a mental disorder and she needs to see a psychiatrist. i’m sorry you have to deal with it. 

Post # 6
Member
12247 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

WHat a nightmare! I’m so sorry you have so much on your plate!

Post # 7
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Whoa!  That is just plain awful.

 

Do you have any real reason that she might really want to harm herself, or do you think it’s just for getting attention?  If you think she does need professional help, I would urge you to get her family involved….do you know how to contact a sibling or her parents?

 

I know you just wanted to vent…and didn’t really want advice per se…but I just wanted to add that in there.  You obviously care a lot about your friend otherwise you would not have created this post.

 

I hope things get better….and if you haven’t anybody else to discuss your wedding planning with, feel free to ask away on the ‘bee!  That’s what we’re all here for!!

 

 

Post # 9
Member
463 posts
Helper bee

Good lord. Sad to say this reminds me of a transformation that happened to my ex best friend from high school… but worse. If she’s anything like my former friend, she’s probably jealous of you, so your efforts to be her personal therapist probably just make her feel more inferior (but she still comes back for more). It’s sad, but I doubt she will stop being jealous of you while you’re close friends.

Keep your distance, and don’t feel bad about it because I suspect it will help her as well as you. Try to stop caring what she says – just know that it’s coming from her massive insecurity. Maybe stop introducing her to your other friends. Don’t reply to messages at night. If she hasn’t changed by the wedding, you can go your separate ways after that. I hope she can get over her inferiority complex and renew the friendship, but that didn’t happen with my friend ๐Ÿ™

Post # 10
Member
955 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@aussiebride26:  Don’t feel badly about that.  It’s what friends do.  

 

This is obviously a cry for help.  If you don’t call her mother, and something were to happen to your friend you will never get over that!!!

 

 

Post # 11
Member
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@aussiebride26:  

u really need to distance yourself from her. turn ur phone on silent at night & rarely return her msgs & start msging her about ur wedding plans or ur problems to equalise the relationship a little, then if she starts anything about that u can say uve tried with her to make it an equal relationship etc. I would definately get her parents involved or whoever she has, im sure she is not treating other people this way or carrying on so much like this to her family. she sounds emotionally unstable & u r not responsible for her.

 

 

it sounds exactly like a girl who i used to be best friends with for about 8 years. yes she was under a lot of stress cos of what had happened to her (lost both parents to cancer etc) but was always taking, chasing guys then crying that they were jerks, only talking about her problems & always wanting money, lifts everywhere etc just using everyone. then she eventually removed herself from my life cos i wasnt bowing down to her enough & i was so grateful. that was a few years ago & she resently tried adding me on facebook without an apology or hi & i just didnt ad her. she had resently been gettng in contact with people she fell out with begging for a place to stay & asking for cash! 

 

 

anyway how bout u how r u going? who have u got to speak to? take some time out for urself u really need it. & im sorry to hear about ur cousin & pop, & that u had to be away from ur guy for that long plus trying to do a PHD. ur a very strong woman. make sure u have some people in ur life who ask how ur truley doing & who can support u in a way that u need. ur r a good friend & a caring person it shows that u want to help her but no one can help her if she cant help herself. also another thing i just thought of, she may be looking at u thinking u have it all, where as she doesnt have a boyfriend, may not be as successful as you etc & is trying to suck some of that from u. just a thought

Post # 13
Member
1299 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I was going to say it seems as though she has bipolar or manic disorders.  If she threatens suicide I would 302 her.  I would simply tell her that as her friend if anything honestly happened to her and you could have stopped it you would feel awful.  Suicide isnt something to joke about or use to get attention.  She sounds amazingly like my cousin and co worker who were both manic depressives and bipolar.  One minute they are up, they next they are below down.  And as long as my cousin stays on her medications she is fine… but she can never go off of them. 

Post # 14
Member
107 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@aussiebride26:  How did u go with ur friend? has she calmed down a bit?

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