(Closed) My Bridesmaid is wearing what?!!! (Need Advice)

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

That dress does sound a bit…not classy. Could you ask her to wear a bolero with it? Or maybe offer to buy her a different dress?

And the hair flower…ya, tell her she can’t wear it. Be nice about it, but tell her that you don’t want her to match the bride.

Good luck!

Post # 4
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

yeah you’re not being a bridezilla…is there another bridesmaid who dress you really like that could just do a comparison? i’m thinking that if she saw the others she might realize how inappropriate hers is. then you don’t have to hurt her feelings.  OR you could be direct about it, and especially since she’s borrowing it that def. works in your favor.  Tell her she can’t wear the white flower….She should understand, tell her it’s too close to what you’re wearing and you want to be unique.

Post # 5
2249 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

Hair flowers are really easy to make! Maybe you could make some for your Bridesmaid or Best Man that are smaller than yours and colored to match your wedding, then tell her you are making her a special one to wear.


As for the dress, I would ask to see it. At least she borrowed it so she didn’t invest money. If she can’t afford a new dress maybe you could help her or find a different dress she could borrow!

Post # 6
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Since she’s your Maid/Matron of Honor, I’m guessing you’re pretty close to her?  I’d just have a gentle but direct conversation with her.  My dearest friend and Best Woman went way out on a limb with the shoes she picked out. I pointed out the reservations I had about them and she agreed with me!  I hated having to say something, I also felt like a Bridezilla.  But I think if she’s your friend, she wil totally understand.

Post # 7
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Well, since you didn’t give her much of a description of your “vision,” you can’t be too upset that she didn’t get the kind of dress you wanted. Classy and simple can also be sexy.  That being said, since she is only borrowing the dress, you should tell her that isn’t what you envisioned and have the other bridesmaids send her photos of their dresses.  And the flower in the hair is DEFINITELY not okay, let her know you were thinking of doing something like that and you’d rather be the only one with a flower in your hair. Good luck!

Post # 9
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

(you posted just before me! lol!)

it IS your wedding, so you get the final say in what goes and what doesn’t. ๐Ÿ™‚

have you asked to see her in the dress?  though spandex doesn’t sound classy to me, maybe if you see her in the dress, especially since you’ve asked for pics of the other dresses) you’ll know for certain.  and, like you said, you can even line ’em all up and point out hers clashes….

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