Post # 1
We’re having budget problems at work, and with no warning my friend just got laid off. He’d been such a big help from the time I started here to now, and this is so unfair. I know it has a lot to do with him having only a master’s and we’re in an academic environment while the other ppl here (except for me and a admin person) are all PhDs. My position is kinda spceialized PR/design based, so my degree is’t expected to be as high up the ladder, but I’m really worried now, my boss is already gone for the weekend, and no one can tell if any other layoffs are planned. I knew we’d been having trouble at work thanks to the economy, but didn’t know it was this bad.
I’m sad for him, shocked, and now I’m so worried about my own job. I was trying to explain at lunch to my Boyfriend or Best Friend that I feel my job is pretty much my only point of value in my mind, wihtout going into the whole ‘I feel terrible about myself at times because you won’t marry me’ mess. I can be okay most of the time just being Boyfriend or Best Friend and Girlfriend because I’m pretty self sufficient, and I’ve been supporting myself. If I lose my job I’d feel like this horrible loser who’s got nothing going for her. I can’t even put it into words. I have no family to bring anything into the the relationship or to help out, it’s my BF’s house, I don’t even own my car, yet – my job is my one ‘accomplishment’ in life. It’s the only thing I can look at and say I’ve managed to do, being pretty self sufficient, with no help from my family, asn as little as possible form the BF’s before he started working. He just doens’t get most of the time that people pretty much disregard our relationship as valid simply because we’re not married, especially since we’ve been together as long as we have, so I have a hard time feeling ‘proud’ of where we are as a couple – I want to be somewhere else.
I can’t ‘fall back’ on family should I get laid off, and somehow being a house-girlfriend (as I am not a wife) seems so moochie and wrong (I really can’t say why – I don’t look down on housewives) even if it’s just while looking for other employment. I guess were I laid off, it’d just reinforce in my mind that I’m disposable, which all ties into the negative ‘waiting’ emotions and PMS this weekend.
My friend is upset, but he’s acting like it’ll be okay. He’s cleaning out his desk and passing things around he won’t need. He seems more the kind to get angry (justifiable) than sad.
Post # 3
My best friend, who I happened to work with at the time, went to work one morning, and the boss was waiting in her office. Fired her for things she didn’t do. It was heartbreaking! Me and other co-workers tried to explain to the boss that it wasn’t her, but she wouldn’t have it. It was sickening.
She is lucky in the sense that her husband has a steady income, but it really upset her, understandably. She recently found a new job, which happens to be at the same job I just got offered a position at! So it will be great to work with her again.
I hope everything works out for your friend. In these times, jobs are extremely hard to come by.
Post # 4
Oh wow! That is so bad for employee morale. What’s done is done for your friend, but I hope everything works out for you though!
I can say from a few months experience that being a house girlfriend is not that bad. It’s actually a great opportunity to work on yourself as a whole. Maybe boost your self esteem by defining yourself by other areas besides just your work. Let’s just hope it doesn’t come to that though!
Post # 5
The friend’s wife is working, I think, and he’s got a few things he can try his hand at, it just really sucks. He went through a lot of trouble to come over here from his home country, to get his wife into the country legally, and has been trying to get permission to bring his mother over, too. This is just ugly, and I’m upset with my boss – last time he had to do this was 2 years back, and he had a big meeting explaining that he was going to ahv to let 2 ppl go for budget reasons, but we had 2 people who were halfway out the door already because of school or a spouse moving, so while it was a little sooner for those 2 people to leave than they’d intended, it wasn’t quite as bad as this. I’m mad at my boss for just springing this on him, on a holiday weekend, no less, and then leaving at a half day, without addressing the rest of our department. The students who work under him are all disheartened, and I don’t know how to help them, either. Also, I just heard my boss is planning on retiring soon, meaning I ahve no idea who’d be incharge of our department, what that means for any of us, and of course, epecially me, since I’m the PR person, and not a researcher like the rest of them.
The house-GF thing just bugs me, because I feel I need to be helping suport us (BF makes a little less than I do – and together it’s under 50K, so we NEED two incomes) – AND since I was disowned by my family, I’ve tried really really hard not to have to rely on anyone because I didn’t want my Boyfriend or Best Friend to think I was with him because I HAD to be, but because I CHOSE to be. Somehow, if we were married, I wouldn’t feel that he could think that after taking vows and all stating how we feel and plan to be together, instead of just floating along like we are as Boyfriend or Best Friend and Girlfriend. AND we’re seeing his family this weekend, and they always say/do something they think will nudge him along towads marrying me, but it a;ways has the opposite effect, and his very pregnant sister is unpredictable and easily offened (yay hormones) and it’s at her house. I just wanna go get a drink and sleep till next week.
Post # 6
This is so sad and Im sorry to hear about your friend. As for you dont be stressed out before you even know anything. You are really thinking worst case senerio here. You even said yourself your job doesnt have the same requirements. Not to mention that even IF you did lose your job, its not like you would be unemployed forever. Dont let this get you down!!!