(Closed) My Cousin just got engaged… and they want the same date we have!

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I think its reasonable to ask them not to have it during your wedding or honeymoon, but other than that you can’t do anything about it.

Post # 4
Member
3261 posts
Sugar bee

When I read the title, I thought they would literally have the exact same date as you have. No one will be comparing your weddings, you’ll each have your own special day, its really not a big deal. And the fact that you may be on your honeymoon during their wedding shouldnt be an issue with them, because it will be understandable why you’re not there. 

Post # 5
Member
907 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

What does “around the same time” mean? If it’s within a few weeks of your wedding, you don’t have anything to complain about. Just last weekend, we went to a wedding for one cousin on Saturday, and another cousin’s wedding on Sunday. No one was comparing them.

Post # 6
Member
2247 posts
Buzzing bee

@babylou:  You’re getting married on my birthday, yay!  Lol!  Sorry, I get excited over little stuff Tongue out.

 

@MsFrancez:  I, too, thought they were choosing to marry on the same day as you.  I would like more clarification on “around the same time”.  I mean, I am not a big fan of family members jumping in and deciding to get married around the same time they know a relative is getting married.  But, if your wedding is a week or two away from theirs, it shouldn’t matter.  At least they are coming to PR, instead of stealing your guests away to Miami.

Post # 7
Member
11 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I wouldn’t worry!! Our wedding was two weekends before a close friend’s wedding.  The majority of our friends attended both weddings and everyone had a blast at both.  Honestly, if your not planning a wedding, you’re really not going to be comparing one to another.  Good luck!!

Post # 8
Member
2820 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

From the title of the post it sounded like they wanted the exact same date, so I just want to let you know that I might be angling a little more to the “you just get a day” side, because your situation is not as bad as your post title made it out to be.

Anyways…yes, it sucks that your cousins would do that. Of course you can talk to them about it, maybe cast it in a light of “You don’t want to have our weddings so close together, do you? Don’t you think it would be inconvenient for our guests?”; make it sound like you’re concerned about THEIR wedding, and/or the guests, and not yourself.

The silver lining I suppose would be if guests were to make an extended vacation, and since both your weddings would be close together, some people might be MORE likely to come. But I don’t know how far away your guests would be coming from, and how close together your weddings will be (physically and date-wise).

Post # 9
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@MsFrancez: Are they aware of your wedding date, did you make an official announcement?

To them it might be more of a “hey lets get all the family together for the two events the more the merrier why should our guest take 2 trips when they can make just one”

However, in your eyes it is more like “it my month my wedding a month or 2 will make a difference and let people calm down instead of having to attend 2 wedding in one month.

The good from all this is that your wedding is first, but the sad part is that you might have to postpone your honeymoon

Post # 10
Member
629 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

It does stink that it’s around your time as well…but late spring/early summer is a super popular time for weddings…so if it’s within a few weeks, I don’t think that it’s unreasonable for them to want to do that.  If they always wanted to get married around that time, it’s not really fair to ask them to pick another season or wait until next year…just my two cents.  🙂

Post # 11
Member
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

double post

Post # 12
Member
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@MsFrancez: Your title is misleading — “same date” and “around the same time” are very different. Call your cousin and congratulate him. Express your concerns to your cousin. If he and his Fiance don’t budge, you’ll manage. Your wedding will be beautiful and unique no matter what.

Post # 13
Member
1306 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Wait, is it actually the same date?

Post # 14
Member
5273 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Agree w/ others I thought literally they wanted the same day….

If it’s around the same time, don’t worry, this won’t steal your spotlight. It’s YOUR wedding and you and your husband will be the center of attention.

The topic ‘My Cousin just got engaged… and they want the same date we have!’ is closed to new replies.

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