- 7 years ago
- Wedding: August 2012
Ok….. 5 1/2 years ago I started dating this guy. He was super church involved and so to me I thought “awe he must be a real great guy” . So we get together… he was quite a bit older than me 5 yrs…. (not too bad) anyway things started out ok. He was 23 and lived at home… wasn’t in school… (hmmm) but I was young and naive. sigh…. lol. SOOO…. we date for a looong time. 2 1/2 years into the relationship I brought up marriage. Now this dude here… heh… this dude here used to talk about how he wanted a wife blah blah blah… well he FREAKS out.. tell me I just want a ring blah blah blah… ok whatever drop the subject.
A few months later he begins talking about going to school out of state. He wants me to come too. Well, I had a career I would have to sacrifice… and I would have to leave my family… but get this… I WASN’T ALLOWED TO LIVE WITH HIM… ok so he’s supposed to be this super awesome christian guy… wrong…. from day one he wanted to fool around and yes we had sex. ugh. So he wants me to drop everything, go with him, find a new roomate (a stranger) and a new job. So I say, ok thats fine but I need commitment so I know I am not moving for nothing. Well here we go again… “you just want a ring, thats all girls care about, blah blah”. Ok this guy has a bad temper. At this point I am getting resentful. I did everything for this guy!!!! He was a child… and 5 yrs. older than me!!!
Later on, we got in some pretty bad fights. One day he got so mad he choked me and left fingerprints around my throat. He would turn around and take me home (like I was a child) if I said something he did not like whenever we were out. He would tell other girls that I mistreat him (one of the girls was from church she was 13 f***ing yrs old) yea… about that, the 13 yr. old girl sent me all the messages between them and he was talking about how mean I was and just making me out to be awful!!! He would dump me off at places when he got mad, he would get physical…. 🙁 . Once when I tried to leave his PARENTS house he took apart my computer and took my car keys so I couldn’t leave and told me that he had a right to because he helped repair my car… and computer (hes the one that damaged the computer) . He could NOT keep a job… and even to this DAY lives at home. Oh yea… he also prances around bible thumping!!! So after years of mental,verbal, and physical abuse (including being layed up in bed with a sore back from being thrown around) I finally got sick of it. I got MAD…
It was like any other day. I was at his PARENTS and we were sitting on the bed. his leg was on top of me and I wanted to get up to do something. I lifted up his leg and tried to move it off me gently cause he looked relaxed. This pissed him off for what ever reason (later he would tell me his leg was sore… right) and he got really angry and very quickly punched me hard in the ribs!!! I could not breathe for a second there!!! He could see the look in my eyes… thats when he started with “well you shouldn’t have…” really??? YOU are blaming me???? At that moment I broke. I said F*** you and left. I was completely and utterly tired of it all. The constant mind games, trying to make me wear clothes he thought I looked good in, holding marriage over my head as in “if you don’t behave I won’t marry you”, making me cry almost every day… Not being able to tell me he loved me for 2 years…. the list goes on and on ….. Well there is a happy ending to this but I am going to write pt. 2 because this is so utterly long.
to be continued…