Post # 31
- Wedding: June 2017 - Greenspot Farms
My grandfather was at my all female bridal shower running the grill but it was a multi generational thing… no risky gifts or anything so it wasn’t weird. We had the bachelorette that night and it was ladies only!!! That’s when I got the dirty gifts lol.
I’ve never been to a bridal shower where dirty gifts were opened, it’s usually a pretty classy day affair where she opens gifts off her registry. All the raunchy stuff comes out at the bachelorette in my social circle.
Mid dirty gifts were being opened I would be very uncomfortable with any father’s present lol.
Post # 32
Can you ask him to come to the shower towards the end? After the gifts are opened? My dad and my fiance came to my shower hours later to say thank you to my guest for attending and mostly to help me with all of the gifts.
Post # 33
It’s up to you but I wanted to let you know it’s not weird (at least at the showers I’ve gone to). The groom has always been there and the father of the bride has been there sometimes too.
Post # 34
What concerns me most is your sense that there may actually be something more going on here. They are literally never apart? Your stepmother never so much as goes to the supermarket by herself?! Does she drive?
Together with your mother’s comments, it does start to raise questions.
In a normal situation, you just say “Sorry, Dad, women only.” If there’s a lot of pushback or stepmother can all of a sudden no longer attend, I’d be inclined to dig a little deeper.
Post # 35
Keep us updated when you talk to him! I think its totally reasonable to say Love you dad but this is women only
Post # 36
Yes, OP is his “baby girl,” and as such, of course it would be uncomfortable for her father to witness his baby girl opening lingerie.
Post # 37
If he INSIST on attending, then i would make it clear he needs to stay in the other room for gift opening. Your stepmom is welcome to stay or sit at the bar with him, but there is no reason to be in the room while you are opening what could be lingerie.
Post # 38
but its a specifically “female only event” women are allowed to have female only events in their lives.. she shoudlnt have to feel bad about that. its a couple hours for gods sake
Post # 39
Thank you all for your advice! 😊 I love the idea of him coming in later after gifts. I did talk to my dad and he understood. But my stepmother never mentioned if she will make it or not sooo… I guess I’ll find out.
And I am not against co-ed bridal showers lol. I was actually leaning towards a co-ed shower until my fiancé shared that he nothing do with a shower and my bridesmaids wanted to gift lingerie since that’s what they got at theirs (most of them are married). And because of that, we made it a female only event.
Post # 40
I went to a shower once where one of the REALLY OLD uncles was present. It was uncomfortable. She was getting underwear and was unable to let loose and have fun with it.
Talk to him and let him know you don’t want him there. Just because he helped create you doesn’t mean he get a free pass.
Post # 41
FWIW i wouldn’t want my mom knowing what underwear I have. Let alome my dad. I agree with the majority.