Post # 1
okay back story, I was mrried once before. I was very young and pregnant, and it lasted but a minute. I didn’t have a big event, we were married by the Justice of the Peace in my borthers living room, then went to a buffet in town after wards.
I’m now with the man of my dreams and we are getting married this summer, with a full on wedding (his first). I asked my father if he wanted to do a father/daughter dance, since he’s not a big dancer I didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. he said no.
now I’m not surprised, but it still stings that he doesn’t want to do that with me. 🙁
thanks for ‘listening’
Post # 3
Of course you’re disappointed. I don’t know about you but I think every girl who has a semi-decent relationship with their father dreams of doing a daddy-daughter dance. He shouldn’t have flat out said no. He should have expressed his feelings as to why and at least keep the option open. I’m sorry darling, that does suck. 🙁
Post # 4
@W292737: That stinks, I’m so sorry. I know so many men who don’t “do” dancing, for whom the thought of dancing in front of everyone at the party is just overwhelming and unpleasant, so I’m sure it has nothing to do with you. If it’s really important to you, you could try sending him a card or something that explains that it would mean a lot to you for him to do it, even suggest some compromises like maybe the groom could dance with his mom at the same time so it wouldn’t seem so spotlight-y or whatever?
Post # 5
I’m sorry that he doesn’t want to do a dance with you. Did you let him know that it doesn’t have to be anything fancy, a nice slow song where you basically just hold each other/hug and spin in a slow circle? Maybe he will come around to the idea, if you give it a bit of time, or let him know that it hurts you that he doesn’t want to have a dance with you.
Post # 6
Aw – I’m sorry! First of all, I wouldn’t assume it has anything to do with the fact that this is your second marriage. I’d guess it has more to do with your father being uncomfortable dancing in front of so many people. I’m in the opposite position – I don’t particurally like parent dances and would happily skip it, but I think my dad would feel left out!
Since you gave him an option of dancing or not, I don’t think you should really be mad at him for saying he would prefer to not dance. But it’s okay to let him know that you’re a little sad to miss that tradition. Maybe there is something else you two could do instead of dance? The best “first dance” I ever saw was at a wedding where the FOB didn’t dance but he used to play piano with his kids every night. They brought out a baby grand piano and the bride sat next to her dad on the piano bench and he played a song for her and there wasn’t a dry eye in the room! And no dancing involved. Are there any special things that you and your dad do together?
Post # 7
@SamanthaMarie89: Nope! I have a fantastic relationship with my dad, I’m just not a fan of parent dances in general!
Post # 8
Almost every girl then! lol
Post # 9
thanks ladies. I’m sure it’s all him. that’s how he can be, it’s still like dang I hoped he was looking forward to it. I think instead we’ll do something special for my duaghters and have them dance with my Fiance and their other grandfathers in place of my special dance. 🙂
Post # 10
@W292737: I’m sorry, if you were looking forward to it 🙁
But I think the dance you are planning for your daughters is super special!
Post # 11
I understand your disappointment!!! I asked my dad if he wanted to say a few words to welcome Fiance into our family, and he said no. Like you really don’t want to say a few words at your only daughters wedding? Ok?
It hurts when people don’t live up to the expectations we have for them sometimes.
Post # 12
I’m sorry! That stings a little for me just hearing that! Did your dad give you a reason why?
Post # 13
@everyheart: thanks, I think they’ll love it, and it wil bring me much more joy then dancing with my dad
@FortiesFlare: exactly, I had thought this might be the way it will go, but nope. so I have to reset my thoughts on it.
@HeatherLM: he’s just NOT a dancer. like at all. it’s just not the type of guy he is.