(Closed) my engagement from HELL. VENT!!

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 62
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

My FI’s mother laughed at the engagement ring he had given me while we saved for a bridal set.  She laughed in front of the whole family and mentioned something in Vietnamese about it being small to which I replied “I love it. It’s perfect and quite frankly, I’m the one wearing it”.  He has since purchased my bridal set and I have a larger engagement ring but I still wear my other one daily.  It’s still my favorite and only 1/4ct.  So don’t let these things get you down.  You’re the one wearing it and what matters is what it means to you and your Fiance <3.

Also, that ring is beautiful :).

Post # 63
Member
34 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Your ring is amazing! Some people get so caught up in size. A big ring dosen’t mean your fiance loves you anymore than having a smaller ring. An e-ring should represent the commitment and the life you plan to share together. You should feel proud of that ring!

Post # 64
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Everyone else has said pretty much all the stuff that I wanted to say, so I’ll just tell you that your ring is perfect and congratulations on your engagement!  I’m sorry that your family is being petty and unsupportive. It sounds like there is a lot more going on with your mother than just the ring, and I really hope that you can sit down with her and explain how hurtful and inappropriate her behaviour has been before it leads to permanent damage to her relationship with your Fiance.  Best of luck, and congratulations again!

Post # 65
Member
2051 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2006

Ugh. Bitches! Seriously. Your ring is lovely.

Post # 66
Member
1675 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Your ring is gorgeous! You and your Fiance love each other and the ring and that’s all that matters. Let them be jerks. Don’t let their rudeness change your opinion on your ring. Flaunt it!

Post # 67
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Clearly, your marriage is doomed because your ring is “only” .5 carats. *eyeroll*

Your Mom has lost her marbles and your ring is beautiful. I’d tell her to stick it next time she gets all preachy about your ring. That’s close to the most shallow thing I’ve ever heard.

Post # 68
Member
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I think your ring is gorgeous. I’m guessing that since you helped pick it out, it suits you perfectly.

That being said, I want to turn my ring to the inside and slap your mama for you. How dare she belittle such a darling token of love & commitment. And your aunt, too! They should be ashamed of themselves! I wouldn’t change a thing about the ring. You & FH chose that ring together. It has special meaning already. I feel like changing it to please those crows would be insulting to your FH & your relationship. It would be setting a precedent for your entire marriage that you really don’t want to start. I suppose you could balance by getting an extroadinarily gaudy band. ;D

Post # 71
Member
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’d tell her that if she doesn’t start being supportive then she’s not invited to the wedding (and come up with an elopement plan if needed).  There is no excuse for being materialistic and selfish like that. 

Post # 73
Member
629 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Honestly I would stand to them and tell them you will no longer tolerate their comments. Your poor fiancé, what a horrible way to be welcomed into the family! You need to stand up for him like you would want him to do for you. Italian mom’s can be totally overbearing IF they are allowed to be.

Post # 74
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@blueandcream:  LOL  that is just what i was thinking when I read your post.  But i added that we will be making payments on it for a long time just so you mom was happy.  LOL

I think your ring is beautiful.  The two of you picked it out and mom should shut her mouth!!

Take some time  mom free and enjoy each other

Post # 75
Member
111 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I almost always too lazy to log in these days, but I had to in order to tell you how beautiful your ring is! I love it, and if you do too thats all that matters.  I can’t imagine what you’re going through, and it must SUCK! My mom and grandma disapprove of my wedding colors (black, ivory and red) and my mom tells everybody that the wedding color is pink, my shower (although wonderful) had pink everything. And my grandma feels the black is too morbid. I just had to let go and stop caring! Easier said than done I know….but hopefully you can start to love your ring all over again soon!

Post # 76
Member
808 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@blueandcream:  I am so glad that sharing my experience was helpful in some way =]  as far as wedding planning is concerned it hasn’t been too bad. Now having said that things aren’t finished yet but there hasn’t been anything major at all. Little tiffs about where to have the wedding our town or theirs (we won lol) how many of their friends should be on the guest list. Nothing has gotten even to the point of raised voices (which..well italian..that’s saying something lol) Anyway it hasn’t been too bad. 

As far as setting new boundaries…uhm..my Fiance talked to them IDK what all exactly he said but it helped lol =] they treat both of us with more respect now.

I really commend you deciding with your Fiance to nip such things in the bud. It’s hard for parents too but it is as good a time as any to make them start seeing you as a grown woman and wife. Good Luck & hugs!

Again your ring is beautiful thanks for extra ring porn!! =]

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