(Closed) My engagement is killing me.

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
1166 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Why don’t you just elope? You don’t necessarily have to get married at a court house if you don’t want to, google elopement packages you can pretty much go anywhere and get married wherever, however, and whenever you want.  There are packages that even include a photographer for an hour or so.  If you still want to celebrate with friends and family have a party later.  

Post # 3
9698 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

Does your Fiance really want a wedding? Then 6 months isn’t long in the scheme of life. If he doesn’t care just go get married! You don’t HAVE to do the whole hoopla.

Post # 4
5226 posts
Bee Keeper

Quetzalcoatlus:  Elope and have a family reception in May. You could even have vow renewal in front of your family then, if seeing you guys exchange vows is important to them.

Post # 5
662 posts
Busy bee

Im sorry why is your Fiance staying in the house you bought? If you bought the house you should be staying in it. That is just my opinion. Also i think you guys should just elope but still have your wedding you are planning.


Post # 6
3236 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

You can wear a dress to the courthouse. Whoever told you that you could not is wrong.


Why not get legally married now, and redo it as a “wedding” when his family can come? 

Post # 7
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Would you both consider eloping beforehand? If you are religious, you could still have a clergyperson officiate your elopement. Is he waiting for his family’s blessing to be officially married? You could still have a celebration and say the vows again with the family in May. 

I am also confused about the living situation. If you bought the house, why is he living in it instead of you?

Post # 10
453 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Quetzalcoatlus:  I totally understand where you are coming from, as Fiance and I are religious traditionalists as well. We got engaged Labor Day weekend last year and will be getting married in about 3 weeks! And there were definetely times during the summer that I was just “over it” all! I felt like we had been engaged forever. Talk to your Fiance and see how he feels about things..

Post # 12
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Quetzalcoatlus:  It would really bother me to be paying a mortgage on a house I chose and yet not be able to live in it even though Fiance was. I think you could still have a lovely private ceremony sooner while still having the more traditional ceremony with your families in May. You won’t have to go through metal detectors unless you really want to :). 

Fiance and I are having a private ceremony in the winter followed by a celebration and re-enactment of vows with our friends and family in the spring. The same pastor officiating our private ceremony will be there again for the spring. Both venues were both handpicked and approved by the both of us. 

Post # 13
2977 posts
Sugar bee

Just get married in courthouse dont tell anyone 

Post # 14
456 posts
Helper bee

You say his parents won’t be able to travel until May 2015 but what about yours? Sounds like the most important thing to you both is to have a ceremony with both your parents in attendance, so maybe you all could fly out to his family’s city and have a very small wedding there sooner than your current date? Wouldn’t have to be literally in the courthouse, you could have it in a park or in their backyard or something that hopefully wouldn’t require you having to reserve the place months in advance.

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