my ex-boyfriend left me for his ex-girlfriend. He now wants me back.

posted 3 weeks ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
1268 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2020

Hell no. Just NO. This loser is afraid of being alone, and he likes the thrill and ego boost of having 2 women.

You should have never taken him back in the first place. 

Post # 3
Member
969 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

He just doesn’t want to be alone.  If you take him back he knows what you’ll put up, even if you say you won’t.  Actions are better than words to tell you who he is.  There is so much better out there.

Post # 4
Member
5005 posts
Bee Keeper

What you need in your life is a healthy dose of self-respect and some therapy, not this guy.

Post # 5
Member
1172 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I think you need to log off this site for the night then re-read your OP tomorrow.  Then answer your own question.  It shouldn’t be too hard to figure that taking him back would be a mistake of colossal proportions. 

Knowing what you know about this loser, if you take him back you will have no one to blame but yourself when, not if, he hurts you again. 

Post # 6
Member
147 posts
Blushing bee

OP,  you know what you NEED to do. But are you going to ignore that (like you did when you “couldn’t be without him”) and do what you WANT to do? The choice is yours.

Just know that if you go back, you will be back in a few weeks if you’re lucky or a few years if you’re not. Do you really have that much time, energy, emotional well-being to waste on someone who will never respect you? Could you use this time to either grow by yourself and/or be with something who KNOWS he loves you insteas of treating you like a placeholder until he has the person he really wants say yes? Again, the choice is yours.

Post # 7
Member
147 posts
Blushing bee

View original reply
@Goirishgrl:  so true. I couldn’t even finish reading OP bc it was just too much! I wish OP would put herself in the shoes of a stranger or a friend reading this. What would she advise her?

Post # 8
Member
1803 posts
Buzzing bee

You both have issues. No to this relationship. No to any new relationship until you can gain emotional independence and learn more about healthy relationship boundaries and expectations. Therapy would be a very good idea. Too much drama.

Post # 9
Member
177 posts
Blushing bee

OP I had to stop reading about half way through. All this back and forth stuff sounds like this relationship is still back in junior high where it started. He made his choice and I don’t mean this harsh but you both sound like you’re afraid of being alone. It’s run it’s course and sometimes fixing things and the temporary high it brings is addicting and a huge rush but it’s not worth it. You can do so much better than this guy. 

Post # 10
Member
110 posts
Blushing bee

Do not go back! He clearly cannot be alone and knows he can manipulate you. You sound very young so you have your whole life ahead of you. Why do you want to be with someone who doesn’t care for you happiness and doesn’t respect you? 

“Our relationship was very  complicated”  

Also, relationships are not supposed to be complicated! Love is easy with the right person. 

 

Post # 11
Bee
5205 posts
Bee Keeper

By all means take him back of you want to go through this inappropriate messaging and back and forth with another girl again. If that doesnt sound appealing then I’d stop talking to him permanently. Word to the wise: it’s foolish to “love” someone who treats you like this. Save your love for someone who actually deserves it. You problem is that you just don’t want to be alone, but learning how to be alone is actually a skill that will help you find someone who is a better fit for you.

Post # 12
Member
7348 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

YOU broke up with HIM. Granted, it was for good reason, but if you’re desperate not to lose someone, don’t send them packing. Regardless, he’s a cheating loser. You broke up with him multiple times for a reason.  Drop him, drop the drama; find someone you won’t feel the need to leave repeatedly. 

Post # 13
Member
2162 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2020

Yeah, hop in a car and speed off at 100 mph from that dumpster fire. What a selfish person he is. There are better people out there OP. 

Post # 14
Member
10425 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

He’s a loser and he’s probably super goofy looking. Do not take him back under any circumstance.

Post # 15
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2020

Please don’t get back with him! He does not sound committed in the slightest. Sorry you’re going through this. If you were happy with him and he’s not the one, imagine how truly happy you’ll feel when you’re with the right guy for you. You don’t want to be with someone who doesn’t treat you right.

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