My ex cheated on me and then got married. Now his wife wants to talk to me

posted 2 months ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
25 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2019

 You don’t owe him anything and you are definitely not obligated to help him fix his marriage because he messed up

Post # 17
Member
2299 posts
Buzzing bee

chessplayer :  so lemme get this straight—he wants the same woman that he lied to, led on, and used to boost his own pathetic ego to to be a key-player in solving the marital problems that *he* created by reopening the wounds of betrayal and deceit that *he* made by using her to cheat within said marriage? 

lmao. what a fucking tool.

also, his wife 100% blames you and simply wants to “talk” with you (read: likely verbally abuse you and use you as a human punching bag because it’s easier to be mad at you than it is to face the reality that her husband is scum and actually leave him) just to unload on you. it will not be a productive conversation; actually, I doubt you’d be able to get a word in at all, as she has no interest in hearing your side. she’s suffering, yes, but she has the option to leave. it’s not on you to assist her in making that decision—you need to focus on your OWN healing.

also, I highly doubt you’re the only “other woman” involved—you’re just the one she happened to find out about…

Post # 18
Member
6657 posts
Bee Keeper

No response required. Block. 

Post # 19
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

Oh he wanted to play and now he wants a favor from you lmfao. Screw him. You don’t owe him a thing. Block his number. And if you get a random call from a number don’t answer it’s most likely her. 

Post # 20
Member
16 posts
Newbee

100% block and move on

Post # 21
Member
12107 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

Do I have this right? You went out with this person in real life only one time, agreed to begin a relationship, but you never heard from him and it never happened. Before that, you were communicating with him for a year, during which time he was actually dating his wife. 

I rarely advise no reply to someone, but I think ghosting is the absolutely appropriate reaction here. The request is offensive and outrageous. He’s on his own and you owe nothing to her, either.

You made mistakes too. Next time, don’t consider yourself to be in a relationship with someone you’ve never met. It’s fantasy, not reality. Reality is he’s not an “ex” at all, he’s someone you met once, under false pretenses. 

Post # 22
Member
639 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2020

I don’t understand why he doesn’t have access to these emails and texts he wants if they were between the two of you. Probably deleted them to hide proof of his infidelity. He’s trying to play you again. Don’t even respond. His wife is never getting them anyway.

Post # 23
Member
981 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

Oh fccckkk no. This is not your problem, not your marriage. F that dude!

Block him and move on!!!

Post # 24
Member
7001 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I would reply with “You let me unknowingly be the other woman and I have no interest in being involved in your relationship in any way. This is between you and your wife, please do not contact me in the future.” Then I’d block him. 

Post # 25
Member
6588 posts
Bee Keeper

Why is he asking YOU to send the emails? He should have copies, unless he deleted them being a shady little fuck. 

Post # 27
Member
276 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

Block block block. Don’t engage with him anymore. I know you feel bad for his wife but it’s not your responsibility to help him “fix” this. He’s a dog, he’s always going to be a dog. 

Post # 28
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

He has the emails and the texts. Block him. 

This reminds me of a Dateline or 48 hours scenario, run. 

Post # 29
Member
244 posts
Helper bee

Not only is every ounce of this situation *his* *own* *fucking* *doing*, he deleted the emails and texts between the two of you to hide his fucked up lying and now’s trying to guilt trip you with a whole “do the right thing” speech (HAAAAAA) to painstakingly forward you every single bit of communication you two had between you JUST so his wife can feel more justified in seeking you out and yelling at you?

Have I missed something here? Goodbye forever, douchebag. He made his bed, he’s gonna have to lie in it.

Post # 30
Member
1671 posts
Bumble bee

I wouldn’t respond and would block him. Something to consider, it could actually be the wife reaching out to you for the emails/texts pretending to be this guy so she can see exactly what your guys’ relationship entailed. Either way, don’t entertain either of them. 

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