(Closed) My ex contacted my FI

posted 11 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
2777 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Wow, that’s really just a bit weird. I’m glad you came to WB to rant instead of contacting him though – like you said, he probably wanted that exact reaction. And I think you’re doing the right thing on focusing your attentions on you and your FH and your future – though I can’t say I’d do the same in your shoes!

Post # 18
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

he’s jealous…misery loves company!! he’s obviously very miserable with his life and is trying to tie you into it. he’s fishing…don’t bite. he knew that this would upset you and because he *thinks* he knows you, he thinks that you’re gonna fight with him or that your man is gonna fight with him. leave him to throw himself a pity party and show him that your life is just to great to be bothered with him at all.

Post # 19
Member
52 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

ooo

I know some people won’t say it to you but I’m not one of those people

I’m a strong believer of “once a cheater always a cheater.”

Post # 21
Member
31 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2009

If something like this happened to me, I would be bothered, too. However, your FI’s reaction shows that he truly trusts you and the relationship as a whole. The ex is probably jealous, immature, bitter as well as super envious of you and your FI’s happiness. He is not worth any more of your time. Hope you can put this behind you and continue to enjoy the wonderful relationship you and your Fiance have built together.

Post # 22
Member
531 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Not to freak you out….but I was wondering if your wedding details were posted in the site?  I mean location, date etc…. Just wondering if this moron would show up and cause a scene? He sounds like a tool. 😛 It’s great that you were honest with your Fiance from the start otherwise it could have been awkward trying to explain…..you have obviously changed your ways, good for you and btw, don’t beat yourself up about it, you were very young, we live and learn. 🙂

Post # 23
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

I second writing out the scathing letter and not sending it. It helps more than you’d think. 

Meanwhile, just take a deep breath and remind yourself that your Fiance was wonderful throughout the situation which means you’re living a wonderful, happy dream come true while the Ex is clearly desperate. 

Post # 24
Member
5262 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

By the way: I think it’s ridiculous to say that because you made a mistake when you were a teenager means you’ll never be capable of a monogamous relationship. I did a lot of things in high school that have nothing to do with the person I am today, and I’m sure most people can say the same!

Post # 25
Member
322 posts
Helper bee

Leafy that’s something to think about!

FutureMrsTal, if you and your ex live in the same town, and/or have the same group of friends, you should definitely cross check whether ex is trying to sabotage your wedding in some way. Maybe have a trusted friend posted at the gate to discreetly keep an eye out for him and remove him from the premises with zero fuss if he does show up.

Even if you make your website private, there are cached versions of the site that will show the previous details… once its on the net, its there forever. I would focus more on damage control now.

Post # 26
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I agree with the majority just ignore him, I’ve learned from experience if you ignore stupid people it irritates them more than if you argue with them you take away their self importance.  If you argue with them they get what they wanted attention.  if your fiance is ok with it then just ignore him don’t waste anytime thinking about his pathetic a**

Post # 27
Member
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

OMG i hadn’t thought of what Leafy said.  i would def find 2 really big dudes to stand gaurd at the door and be on the lookout for the idiot. And then don’t think of him anymore don’t let him ruin you day in any way shape or form.  Don’t give him what he wants.

Post # 28
Member
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Remember what they say “Living well is the best revenge”! It’s obvious that it kills him to see you happy and in a successful relationship. I would definitely remember that and, instead of contacting him, maybe add something to your website about how happy you are!

Post # 29
Member
7052 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Take the higher road and ignore him. But I like Circus Peanut’s idea about putting something wonderful and loving on your site.

Definitely make it private.  Keeps crazies like that x of yours from crawling out of the woodwork.

Post # 30
Member
322 posts
Helper bee

But bellenga, if she’s making her site private, then adding Circus Peanut’s idea would be superfluous right?Undecided

Post # 31
Member
3538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

hes already seen the website to send the comment, so hes seen the details?

what an utter moron! (I would extend my french vocabulary but ill keep it pg to describe him)

Im glad your FH isnt bothered by it. Dont let them get to you. Exes always have a way of bringing up negative emotion just ignore it!

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