Post # 1
I dated this guy a couple years ago and genuinely thought he was The One. We spent a lot of week-nights together, but he was usually busy with friends or family commitments on weekends. Six months down the line I discovered that he had a long-term girlfriend who worked away during the week and came home most weekends – he’d made me into the other woman without me realizing!
But this isn’t a rant about our relationship. It’s a rant about how, after I dumped him, he never told his girlfriend what happened and he married her a couple weeks ago. A mutual friend attended the wedding and the photos are splashed all over Facebook; I couldn’t resist looking. I’m not even engaged, and this douchebag bought a huge diamond and a big house for his fiancee, and then got married 🙁
Jealous? Perhaps – but not of his new wife, I actually feel sorry for her in a way because he’s a douchebag and she probably doesn’t realize. I suppose I’m resentful because he treated me like crap and now he (and his wife) have everything I ever wanted, while I have nothing 🙁
How come a douchebag like him can give all of that to his woman, and my boyfriend can’t even TALK about commitment, never mind buy me a modest ring and consider making some plans?
Rant over… deep breath…
Post # 3
Another deep breath. 🙂
Totally hear ya! But I’ve found that Karma has a way of rearing it’s ugly head eventually. I know it sucks to see someone reveal in the trappings of happiness when they’ve clearly not earned it, but he’ll get his. I promise. Even if it’s not today or tomorrow, it will come back to bite him. I will say that you don’t have nothing. You have a bf who respects you enough to not have a second life behind your back. And that kind of thing, to me, is worth more than the world’s largest rock. And I’m sure the committment business will come around in time as well.
I’m sorry. I’m sure it’s incredibly frustrating. Hope the rant helped! 🙂
Post # 4
@Fiberoptic: You say you have nothing but look at it this way…..you had something – a lucky escape from a guy like that! I can imagine that it must be shocking to realise so much in such a short space of time but WHEN you do finally get married, you’ll be marrying someone you trust and love.
The waiting part can be the hardest but I honestly think you should be looking at your ex and his new wife and smiling. It could have been you!!
Post # 5
What you have is sincere and real…which is not what they have. Consider yourself lucky.
Post # 6
He bought her the “huge diamond” out of guilt, I’m guessing.
Stop looking at the photos. You know deep down he is not the most honest guy. You dodged a bullet.
Don’t worry. It will happen! For now, don’t dwell on other people and what they are doing. I’ll admit, this would piss me off, too, BUT…I’d rather have the real relationship that I have than a guilt diamond.
Post # 7
Wow, I’m so sorry that he treated you like that. But try to remember that the “commitment” he finds so easy to give to his wife is easy because he is not that committed (he had a 6 month affair and has yet to tell her the truth). Your time will come but, in the meantime, try to speak to your SO about it if you can and try to enjoy every moment of your special relationship with him. It is real and it is much more valuable than a house or a diamond.
Post # 8
Honey….you dodged a bullet. She has a cheating lowlife of a husband. A nice house and a big ring doesnt change that, nor will it every make someone happy.
You have the knowledge that your better than this loser guy so walk with you head high!
Post # 9
Time to crank Best thing I never had by Beyonce on the radio and remember, you dodged a hugh bullet! Any man that will cheat to be with you will cheat on you to be with some one else!
Post # 10
Completely understand. When I found out my ex got married (for the second time since we had broken up less than 5 years ago…busy guy) it was a punch to the gut. Not because I still wanted him or had feelings for him. Everytime I find out something new about him, it makes me appreciate my SO even more. It just was hard to swallow that I wasn’t good enough to him to break up with in person or be faithful to but the next two girls were good enough to marry. As far as I’m concerned, he’s a selfish, chronic cheating asshole. Too bad no one who has met him seems to agree. He’s got the ‘nice guy’ image down to an art. I think me and his ex-wife are the only ones who see him for what he really is.
Best thing for you to do is block him (and the wife!) on FB or any other media site you’re on and resist looking at any photos of him/her/them. Trust me, it is hard to resist the temptation! But important for your sanity and your relationship with your boyfriend. Remind yourself what a doucebag he is and how your boyfriend is everything he is not. Your time will come. *HUGS*
Post # 11
I’ve been following your other posts about your troubles with your current SO. While those problems are very real, at least your man is generous and kind towards you. He just needs a bit of a push, albeit a very hard, firm, realisitic one.
What you dodged with your ex, is a huge bullet. He’s a cheater, and even tho he bought his “other woman” a big diamond, etc, that does NOT mean it’s a good relationship or that he is a good man. Remove him from any kind of social media and start to feel sorry for the poor woman that he duped. I would be devistated to be in her situation b/c while you got out of it, she married it.
Post # 12
Honestly, I UNDERSTAND where this is coming from… but you aren’t the one who should truly be miserable here- SHE should be, and the sad this is, she likely doesn’t even know it.
You said that they have everything- ie, “she” has everything, but doesn’t she really have nothing? She has a diamond ring and wedding band built on lies, and a house with built on a foundation of lies, and we will likely see her posting over in emotional sometime soon about discovering her cheating douchey Darling Husband screwing around on her even long before she accepted all those material goods based on lies.
If this is a contest (which of COURSE it isn’t) I think you are far ahead than that poor girl.
I honestly wish you had known about the wedding sooner to tip this poor girl off to this jackass and save her from it.
I am sorry if this is harsh.
Post # 13
Woow don’t you hate when genuinly bad guys act like they’re prince charming? I HATE IT!
Post # 14
Honey, you know you made a lucky escape right? Besides, I don’t see that marriage lasting long if he lied/cheated on her with you (sorry you had to go through that though). Things always come out in the wash in the end. You are so much in a better position – you are in an honest loving relationship! 🙂
Post # 15
my way of dealing with exes is pretending theyre dead. read the book: Exorcising Your Ex: How to Get Rid of the Demons of Relationships Past. best break up book on the planet!!!
but facebook sucks and it’s so easy to come across info!!!
i have two exes that got married. one since we’ve broken up has gotten married, divorced, married again and has gained 30lbs! he’s ONLY 33 with two marriages and three kids!!!
the other is addicted to pain pills.
their wives can HAVE them—good luck!
dont look back. it’s over for a reason! i think about how im so thankful not to have them in my life!!!
dont compare yourself to their relationship either or try to hurry yours up to keep up.
Post # 16
he sounds like scum. my ex from college, the only guy I ever loved (at that point) married my arch enemy. this was during a time when I was really lonely, and really regretting having dumped him, so it hurt so much to see their engagement announcements. but I got over it!
like @Rush1986: said, you dodged a bullet! pat yourself on the back!