Post # 16
definitely ask her about this directly then. BUT make sure your brother is also present so that he’s aware if her behaviour too. Ask her if there’s a reason for her behaviour and if she denies it, then ask her if you can hold your nephew right then and there. Ask to spend time with him but reassure her that you only want to do it while she and/or brother is present. Asking to babysit while they’re out or taking him out by yourself might scare her off.
Post # 17
I don’t think her past excuses it, but it does explain it. I am also betting there isn’t a lot she can do about it. Again, why she is so standoffish with the baby is a mystery to me though. I wonder if maybe she uses the baby as a “shield” so to speak you guys are around? If she is holding the baby, she might feel like she has an excuse to not be social. If someone else is holding or playing with him, then she doesn’t have a distraction if people try to interact with her.
I think offering to babysit might your best bet. That way you can interact with your nephew and she won’t have to interact with anyone else.
Post # 18
Update: I text my Future Sister-In-Law a day or so after I posted the original post and asked if I could come over for a play date with my nephew, she said yes… I was shocked! Yesterday was the day and when I got to their house she was friendly and open (confusing much?), I only briefly got to play with my nephew because she held him a lot (not at much as usual but still enough to stop much playing from happening!) I only stayed for about an hour and a half, all in all it was lovely to see my nephew, I would have liked to have been able to do more than help him up and down the slide once but hey… I’ll take what I can get!
Post # 19
Well that’s a step forward! At least she tried. I hope this works out for you.