(Closed) My FI gave me a choice…

posted 6 years ago in Wellness
  • poll: What would you choose?
    tatas : (98 votes)
    49 %
    baby : (100 votes)
    51 %
  • Post # 47
    1119 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2010

    If you plan on trying to breastfeed, I would go with babies first.

    My friend had to have surgery after breastfeeding her two babies, not because her breasts were sagging after, but because they were very different (not the same size, pointing in different directions) and it made her very self-conscious…

    It would be a shame if you had surgery, then breastfed and then have your breasts end up all wrong again. All that money spent for nothing..

    so I’d have the babies, then redo the breasts just once and have them look amazing. 🙂

    Post # 49
    164 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    Imho, I say do the surgery. I agree with other posters that insurance should cover this if it is a deformity, but the thing that tips the scales for me is that by having surgery you increase your chances of breast feeding which is sooo important to a babies health.  The added bonus is your confidence.  You are young the kids can wait a year or so and maybe no waiting at all if insurance picks up the tab.

    Post # 50
    437 posts
    Helper bee

    @Quicksand:  It depends. How old are you? I see that your current deformaty could affect breast feeding? 

    I would probably do the surgery first. You will need time to heal, which will be hard with a child. Unless, of course you feel 100% ready to have a child and are a little older/more mature then say, a 23 year old who still has plenty of time to conceive.

    Post # 51
    6015 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: March 2012

    If it bothers you so much, why haven’t you done the surgery already?  I’d say try the TTC first, you let Fiance see you, you wear bathing suits …. it’s waited this long, I think I’d rather TTC first. 

    Post # 52
    472 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    @Quicksand:  I’m guessing from this that you have a fairly severe tuberosity? Definitely check in to insurance, and don’t let up, either- especially if there is no implant involved, there should be a way to get this covered by your insurance. Talk to multiple surgeons offices if necessary. Somebody out there should know how to bill this in a way that it’s treated as the non-cosmetic procedure that it is. 

    I had extremely small and mildly tuberous breasts, and I know how different that feels than run of the mill wish-I-had-more-cleavage insecurity. Having surgery was absolutely life-changing for me and I’d do it again even if it meant not having children at all.

    I’m firmly in the surgery now, babies later camp.

    Post # 53
    7169 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    @Quicksand:  Personally, I would most definitely have the kids first. Every single person I know with kids had a change in their breasts after having kids. For some, it was that they got bigger and a welcome change. For others, they deflated and got saggy and were not happy about it. I know someone who got a boob job before having kids, then had two, and wishes she waited (and did end up going back in for another surgery). Sure, you could have kids and your boobs won’t change at all, but for me personally, I wouldn’t chance spending all that money only to have a pregnancy change it. I have a large chest, and I want a reduction and lift really bad….but I’ve already told myself I won’t do it unitl after I’m done having kids. 

    Post # 54
    62 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Being that u r in your 20s I would say boobs.  I agree with the pp about it making u feel more confident and also it may allow u to save more for the kids In the long run.  Plus u may not have to wait that long For kids.  when u get close to having it payed off u can start ttc cuz it’s gonna be 9 months till baby anyways.

    Post # 55
    62 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I also think some ppl r missing that this IS NOT a boob job so while your boobs may change it’s getting the defect fixed

    Post # 58
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Will the surgery effect your ability to breast feed if that is the route you want to take? If so, and you don’t want to forumla feed, I would TTC first and then do the surgery later. Pregnancy and breastfeeding change the way your breasts look anyway, so maybe they will change drastically, who knows! If you are young and have plenty of time to think about children in the future, and have no worries about how this surgery could effect TTC in the future I would go for it. Has your Fiance said how long you would have to wait between surgery and TTC? Or just until you can save that money up again? $7,000 shouldn’t be that hard/take that long to save up for TTC again. Either way, you will have to choose because I’m sure any doctor will tell you not to have an elective surgery right after or before having a baby. You would probably have to wait around a year at least just to give your body time to heal.

    Post # 59
    2538 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    @Quicksand:  Normally I would say BABY! But in this case, I don’t see why you should put off something like this surgery…if it’s going to make you happier about yourself and it’s not purely selfish, and your Fiance would be happy either way…I say now is the perfect time to have the surgery.

    Post # 60
    8686 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I would do the surgery. You’re young so you can TTC later on AND who knows when you would want to spend $7k after having a child? Personally I probably wouldn’t bc I would want to have a college fund and lots of other things for my children.

    The topic ‘My FI gave me a choice…’ is closed to new replies.

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