(Closed) My fiance dumped me today and my heart is broken.

posted 5 years ago in Catholic
Post # 16
Member
36 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2014

I’m so sorry. I had a fiance leave me, and at the time, it was the end of the world. I was so angry at him, so hurt by him. And somewhere in the middle of that darkness, a friend of mine reached out. He has turned out to be a blessing in disguise, and I’m so thankful that my ex bounced. I never realized that love was supposed to feel like <i>this</i>.

I know it is hard, but hang in there. I can promise that it gets better.

Post # 17
Member
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

 

sadgirl:  I’m sorry you’re going through this.  Break ups are definitely hard and you feel like you’ll never be happy again. I’m going to go against the grain here but to see it from your ex Fiance side,  from what you said,  I can understand his side too. I may be a bit bias here because I’m not religious at all.  

I just think he wanted to start a life with you already.  Assuming that he’s older,  doesn’t sound like he wants to waste anymore time to get accepted into your church to marry you,  since he already waited 2 years.  And now that you’re making it manditory  that you want to get married in a catholic church and getting rejected,  he probably thinks now what’s going to happen. And I can understand spending time with your mom. But he’s also probably  feeling that the quality time you guys can be having,  he has to share it  with your mom.  But if you guys lived together,  I’m sure he wouldn’t feel so left out with you spending so much time with your mom.  

It must be frustrating for him for you two to sleep together then you go home instead of staying over.  I think it’s good that he wanted you to move in and spend more time together.  Just means that he loves you and wanted to start a life together with you.  There’s only so much time a person is willing to wait.  

Is this really worth losing the one you really love?  I’m not being snarky, just trying to understand what’s really important to you.  If you feel you did the right thing and want to stay true to your beliefs, then you soon will realize that he wasn’t the one for you.  

I am really sorry you are feeling so hurt though.  I’ve been heartbroken before and I definitely know the feeling. It’ll take time,  but promise you it will get better.  You just have to believe that you are making the right choices. 

 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 12 months ago by  newbeelove.
Post # 18
Member
59 posts
Worker bee

poor girl, i’m so sorry this happened to you. but i also feel that, i can understand why your Fiance made the decision.

for those that said he didn’t respect your belief, i can’t agree. he has waited for 3 years, bought you a e-ring. thats already shows that he respected your religion and he loves you. if he is around his mid 40s, its is very understandable that he wants to build his own family without having to get APROVED by some people in your church he might not even know. to him, its probably AS HARD TO TAKE AS its for your to sleepover.

if you are asking him to understand YOUR situation and YOUR belief, don’t you think you should try to understand his as well? he might not be Catholic but it doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a BELIEF.

to him, his belief could be “as an adult man, you should be able to make your own decision” and his situation could be “he doesn’t think he has plenty of time in life to wait”.

 

most importantly,

in your situation, i don’t in fact understand what exactly he can get out of waiting? it seems like… you just won’t be able to marry him cuz your church didn’t approve and thats your BELIFE which he got to respect……… in another word… its it like he HAS to dump you in order to respect your belief ? i think its very unfair to say that he made you chose between him and your belief. i feel like your belief is against him not him against your belief. plz forgive me if i’m wrong.

 

by the way, does Catholic believe in the bible? (sorry not exactly familiar with Catholic belief). but i’ve read the bible, which part of it says that you can’t get married unless approved by your church? i thought God loves divorced people too… man…

 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 12 months ago by  lilblackbee.
  • This reply was modified 4 years, 12 months ago by  lilblackbee.

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