Post # 1
My fiance revealed to me last night that he hates strapless dresses. It randomly came up in convo, I sent him a picture of me wearing a flowing strapless maxi dress (which he has seen me in IN person before) and I told him that I sent it because I felt really pretty that day. He promptly replied “you did? Well I don’t like that dress. Not at all.”
That was the sound of my jaw hitting the floor. OMG, I was SO hurt that he said that and especially the way he said it. He apologized and we talked it out but we eventually got to the bottom of the issue: he doesn’t like strapless dresses because he feels they’re not secure and they’re gonna slip right off (he’s wrong; my strapless bras are like military artillery, I don’t DO wardrobe malfunctions). Also. I have nice shoulders that I like to show off whenever possible. That said, I’m convinced now that he’s going to hate my custom-made wedding dress and I’m pretty sure there’s nothing I can (or am willing) to do about it. I’m afraid he’s going to see me at the top of the aisle and feel disappointment rather than the overwhelming happiness I would want him to feel (for those of you who have been following my story, you’ll recall that this is the same man who wants to wear a PURPLE effing suit but poo-poo’d me wearing ivory because he feels it’s “dingy and dirty”). Loud sigh.
Post # 3
maybe its just the maxi dress he doesnt like? a lot of guys dont like that look.
Post # 4
A strapless maxi dress and a strapless wedding dress are completely different things. I wouldn’t worry about it, he’ll love whatever you’re wearing that day!
Post # 5
You are compairing him seeing you in a pic of your SUNDRESS rather than your WEDDING DRESS… STOP!!! He is going to love it because it is going to be the dress you wore the day you guys took each other as husband and wife. Men aren’t that shallow. He is going to care more about the emotions you guys are sharing on that day, not what you got on. He probably could care less if you showed up in a paper bag, as long as you say “I DO” to him.
Post # 6
- Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley
Lol, same thing happened to me… kind of. He saw a picture of my dress (he did not know – I was going through a page of dresses), and goes, “Wow that’s ugly. Don’t get a dress like that!” I’m like……….. “Oh I won’t!” /defeated
Post # 7
That stinks. I know where he’s coming from though. The people at the dress store assured me the dress wouldn’t slip off and it never did but I was determined to get straps anyways, have you considered adding straps or cap sleeves? You’ll still have the dress but will have the security and comfort knowing he wouldn’t hate the dress?
I know it’s YOUR dress and you should wear it if you love it, but you want to know he’s thinking of how beautiful you are in the dress when he sees you, not worry he hates it when you walk out.
I made the straps myself on my dress and (unfortunately) had my grandmother sew them on for me. They kept falling off, even walking down the aisle. I wanted to sew them on myself because I’m good at it but my mom convinced me to let my grandma sew them on for me. Either way though, it wasn’t a drastic change to the dress at all, it just changed from strapless to strap and didn’t take away from the dress but did give it more detail (I spent a good 48+ solid hours DIYing the straps) so it could be an option to do something like that, I’d just suggest having a seamstress sew it on for you if you go that route.
Post # 8
“ @MrsWBS: A strapless maxi dress and a strapless wedding dress are completely different things.”
Post # 9
@Overjoyed: Could you add straps of cap sleeves just for the ceremony? Then you could disconnect them for the reception part. That way he don’t have to worry about you dropping the dress as you walk towards him, but you can still show off your shoulders during the party!
Post # 10
UghUghhhh. I am in the same situation. My fiancé and I have VERY different ideas about what a bride should look like. He wants bohemian, flowers in hair and long flowy dress and I bought cathedral veil, lace and tulle ball gown. He wants hair down and I want it up. I’m really starting to get a little sad that he won’t appreciate any of it. We have decided to do a first look that the photographer will capture and I’m terrified he won’t cry or look happy! But when I went to buy my dress, I tried a few I knew he’d like and just felt like it was something I could wear any day. My solution was to wear what would makE me feel like a blushing bride and buy an outfit that he would love for the rehearsal. Good luck! I feel your pain….
Post # 11
I hate maxi dresses so I get where you DH is coming from. As PP stated a maxi dress and a wedding dress is completely different look.
Post # 12
Men say th dumbest things. He is going to love your wedding dress and he won’t even think of the strapless part. Maxi dresses and strapless wedding dresses aren’t the same look to a guy, IMO.
please don’t worry about it. Love your dress and go forward with confidence that he’s going to Love the way you look because its you!
Post # 13
I dunno, I love flowy maxi dresses and my husband doesn’t like them or think they’re flattering. Your husband will love you in your wedding gown, though, I promise! I wouldn’t worry that what he said about a strapless maxi sundress is really the same as his opinion on your wedding gown. Engaged guys need someone to tell them not to say negative things about strapless dresses in the company of their brides-to-be!
Post # 14
@Overjoyed: There are many things I wear that Fiance hates. I told him that if that is how he feels he has to take me shopping….he did! I got a new wardrobe! hehe
Post # 15
Don’t listen to him! My husband said all kinds of stuff like that prior to our wedding – he hated mermaid, and fit and flare dresses, a wedding dress had to be totally white, sparkly dresses are dumb, etc etc etc blah blah. He had a vision that brides HAD to be in princess ball gowns like in chick flicks. I knocked his socks off on the day of our wedding in an ivory fit and flare with sparkles. 🙂 I promise you he will love you in your gown and he’ll eat his words!
Post # 16
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