(Closed) My Fiance is gone to Iraq for 6 months…

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3285 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

hugs!

i think that’s a fantastic timeline though…and really, it does allow you time to do your reserach and narrow down vendors so basically if you want to make decisions together, you can present option a,b,c for his input which will be a great process.

Post # 4
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee

I think you’ll be fine with six months to plan together. But, you might not be able to get started right away. I’m sure when he gets back you’ll just want some time to be together rather than springing all the wedding planning stress on him right away. So I would do a lot of research now and just make final decisions with him down the road. Good luck!

Post # 5
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I think that since you will already have the location, dress, and photographer you won’t have a lot of things left to plan in the last 6 months.  I would make sure that you have some time to spend with him when he gets back without wedding planning!  I’m sure keeping busy will make the time go by much faster!

Post # 6
Member
2030 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I had a professor one time that used to say, “Do the things you don’t have time for first, because you’ll always find time to do the things you need to do.” It is great advice, and I think it would work well for you. If you spend the time while he’s away working on wonderful little details (a monogrammed handkerchief, amazing escort cards, hand-calligraphed envelopes, whatever you can think of!), then you can hammer out the important stuff when he gets back. By the end you will have everything done on time.

Post # 7
Hostess
18644 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

And I just wanted to add that if he is like most guys, he probably won’t care about the details like what the flowers look like or what color the napkins are.  So you might want to save the really big things like food for when he gets back and try to get everything else done now!

Post # 8
Member
815 posts
Busy bee

First off, I’m sending you big hugs and good thoughts.  I can imagine how you must feel.  My Boyfriend or Best Friend is in the military, and we aren’t sure when he is deploying again.  We are thinking sometime this Summer.  If that turns out to be right, I could be in the same situation as you are.  And it IS possible.  We have a few friends that did things that way, and it worked out fine.  Their weddings were amazing, and most important, they are happily married.  You can try to work on the details while he’s gone, it will help time fly by faster.  Best of luck to you and your FI!

Post # 9
Member
365 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

First and foremost welcome futureb.  I think your timeline is fine. 

I got engaged a month before my mister was to deploy to Afghanistan.  In the 11 months he was gone.  I was able to book our venue and ceremony site.  I also got as many things out of the way as I could, like dress, shoes, flowers.  I also made a binder with inspirational photos, so when he got home a couple weeks he saw the vision I was going for. 

We currently have 8 months to plan everything, since I too waited, but if you have a vision it’s easier to make everything come together.

Also if you need anyone to just talk to, to get through the deployment feel free to PM me.

Post # 10
Member
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

Congrats on your engagement, and big hugs and prayers to you and your FH, I’m always impressed by military brides, you girls are so strong and brave to face having your FH away from you for so long!

6 months will be plenty of time to get everything else done, but you might want to do some of the “girl” stuff while he’s gone to keep yourself occupied!

I know EJS planned her wedding while her FH was overseas so she might be a good one to talk to about that…

Post # 11
Member
2393 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I’m sending a big ol hug your way because I know exactly what those deployments are like!  Fiance was over there for 15 months. 

I think you’re outline sounds very doable.  You have the 6 months that he’s in Iraq to plan the “details” that he wont’ be interested in….And, that’s usually a lot. lol  And then you’ll have 6 months when he gets back.  I think that’s more than enough time to plan a wedding! 🙂

Post # 12
Member
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Welcome to the Long Distance Club! It stinks and is really, really hard, but… it’ll come to an end eventually.

Do you know if you’ll be able to hear from him regularly? Or is he in one of those no contact zones?

I’m doing a lot from far away (from my SO and my location) and I’m thinking that doing a lot of pre-research is going to save us time when we’re together. I’ll basically have most stuff narrowed down to a few choices, and then he can help decide between them. 🙂

Post # 13
Member
3979 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

HUGS! What a bittersweet engagement… I will keep you and your FH in my thoughts & prayers. I’m in a LDR, but its nothing compared to what military brides must go through. My good friends husband is in the army & just got back from a year in Afghanistan so I have a teensy tiny (I mean miniscule!) bit of understanding of how tough it is on those left at home.

I definitely think you can get it all done in 6 months! I also don’t think you should stop planning while he’s in Iraq. Save ideas, start DIY projects & basically use this time to “pencil in” your plans. Then when your Fiance arrives home you can nail down the smaller details pretty quickly. Not only will you decide on your overall vision for your wedding day, but it will also keep you busy 🙂 Take care!

Post # 14
Member
1149 posts
Bumble bee

Awww, I’m sorry that your love will be so far away for so long — but what a fantastic reunion you will have when he returns!

Sure you can plan a wedding in 6 months.  Like others say, do a lot of pre-planning, get options ready for him to review and give input on, DIY whatever you want to DIY that you know he won’t have a strong opinion on….and remember, you have the power of the Hive to help you with ideas and inspriation and tips during crunch time!  Smile

Post # 15
Member
4480 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2010 - Calamigos Ranch

You could easily plan an entire wedding in six months, especially since you’ll have all the major big stuff done before then. You can also start tackling your side of the guest list while he’s gone. Best of luck, and keep checking in here in the meantime if you need support or encouragement!

Post # 16
Member
5498 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

My sister planned her wedding in 2 months. You can easily pull off one in 6. = )

I’ll keep you guys in my thoughts! = )

 

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