(Closed) My fiancee feels guilty over the marriage expenses spent by her parents.

posted 4 years ago in Money
Post # 3
7999 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

@Eswaramoorthy:  I also struggle to accept gifts from my family. If it makes her feel better, I presume that you are in a culture where you take care of your elderly relatives within your own homes. Perhaps you could say to her that, when her parents age, she will repay the debt by looking after them in their dotage?

Post # 4
974 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I think if they have to borrow it then you both together tell them you love the gesture but want them happy and comforable as they age and do not want them to take on debt to celebrate or for gifts for you both.  Your finding each other and your families welcoming you are wonderful gifts.  Let them know you are truely happy to be welcomed to the family and that you would rather they don’t over-extend themselves so that you can see them happy in the future as you will be family and will want them happy and comfortable, not stressed paying debt.

If they can outright afford it, then I would graciously accept, but if they would have to go into debt, not so much!

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