(Closed) MY FI!MY LIFE!CHEATING?NOOOO!!CANT BE:(((WHAT DO I DO?!AND

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3968 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@overthemoon2004:  Personally I could not stay with a cheater, not only for myself, but especially if I had children because I would want a better role model for my children. However, I am not you, and therefore can make no decision for you. I am sorry you are going through this.

Post # 4
Member
1595 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I agree, I would rather be single and happy than commit myself to life with a cheater…the thought of it is just draining!

Post # 5
Member
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Cut your losses and get rid of this guy right now. He doesn’t deserve a family. If he gets away with this now, he’ll continue to do it throughout your relationship. I understand that it hurts (I’ve been there too…) but you need to be an adult about this for your own sake and your child’s, too.

Explain to him that you realized he doesn’t take his commitment to your family seriously and that you can’t have him as part of your life. You are much better off without him – keeping him around will lead to more pain later.

Post # 6
Member
4429 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@overthemoon2004:  i was 5 months pregnent with my son when this happened to me he was cheating on me with 3 girls one at school one at the gum and one he worked with yeah i know my world crumbled when i found out. we were living together at the time.

i moved the hell out and left him. i could not punish my unborn child with him making me out of comtrol and crazy caz he wants to cheat. you cant stay caz you have a child its not a reason.

the child will feel your pain and feel its fathers pain too.

you have to put your child first and end it

theres an old saying.

put up and shut up or get out!

its just sad and im so sorry hes doing this to you.

be strong!

  

Post # 7
Member
152 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

For that long and that many times. I couldn’t do it. I would go find someone who wanted me and only me. I’m so sorry. Keep your head up! 

Post # 8
Member
78 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

If I were you I would leave him!!! My advice to you no matter what choice you make is to begin couples counseling; not only will this help you make a decision, but if you do end up leaving him you both will still need to learn how to co-parent together and a marriage and family therapist can help you with all that. 

Post # 9
Member
1183 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Im so sorry. You should not have to deal with this and you should leave.

If you must stay because you are not ready to leave, then protect yourself and baby first. Try to Stay strong and not trust him easily. Move past it and seek counseling to deal with your sadness. With time, it may be easier to leave.

Post # 10
Member
5428 posts
Bee Keeper

@overthemoon2004:  obvious he’s a liar…but i have a child with him?

How do you know he doesn’t have a child with other girls? 

Post # 11
Member
7293 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

While you have a baby with him, do you want that type of relationship for your life and also to model for the baby? I also see you got very angered, and resulted to a little physical violence- while Im sure he deserves it in your mind that also is not something you want to get into.

Personally, I think you should both start with therapy and go from there.  I can’t speak for what you are willing to put up with, or what your relatisnhip has been like over the years.

If it were me, he would be kicked out or if I lived with him, I would be making plans to get out and start over. I would deserve more than that .

Post # 12
Member
242 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You deserve better.  You CAN leave him.  You WILL be ok.  It’s up to you to decide how you want to proceed.  Lots of love your way!

Post # 13
Member
1544 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

i couldn’t do it either…. i don’t blame you forgiving him the first time… but not again and not after that…. thats not just texting cheating – thats emotional cheating and just as bad as physical IMO. It would be game over – take a hike time for me.

You’ll never completely get rid of him because its still his child but he doesn’t deserve you too. Good Luck!

Post # 14
Member
13012 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’m so sorry you’re going through this!  I would not be able to forgive a cheater, even if it was “just” texting cheating.  That’s still cheating in my book, and I couldn’t get past it.  Once the trust is gone, it’s gone for good.

While it’s devastating, please be careful with the physical violence (you had said you slapped, pushed, and and kicked him).  You don’t want that to come back and bite you (especially if there’s a kid involved, and it may come up in a custody battle…).  Plus, no one deserves violence, no matter how slimy their actions. 

Post # 15
Member
3452 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

It’s one thing to forgive him for one time, then work on getting past it somehow.  That is hard enough.  Multiple times?  No way!  You do deserve better.  You can live without him.  There are plenty of men out there that will not cheat and treat you with respect.

Post # 16
Member
2401 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I couldn’t get past the “I’m a great detective” thing… and then you physically abused him.

Yes, he cheated on you. And you should leave. End of story. But you had no right to invade his space or to lay a hand on him like you did.

The topic ‘MY FI!MY LIFE!CHEATING?NOOOO!!CANT BE:(((WHAT DO I DO?!AND’ is closed to new replies.

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