(Closed) My friend is marrying Dr Jekyll

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

My gut says that this is none of your business and you shouldn’t worry about it unless your friend specifically asks for your opinion. You only know their relationship from the outside looking in, and I’m sure there’s a lot of things you don’t know about both parties and their relationship together. I would just wish them the best and keep my mouth shut.

Post # 5
Member
2261 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

At least she’s not marrying Mr Hyde 😉 (kidding, but he is the bad one) 

I know you mean well as a friend and yes, it can be really hard to watch a friend making these mistakes. 

Does your friend come to you for advice? If so, maybe you could suggest something or at least be in a position to. If not, I’d stay out of it altogether. Yes you want the best for her and that’s great, every marrige has its tough spots, so does every relationship too… sometimes you just have to keep quiet and let them make their mistakes on their own. Happy, greedy, selfish or not this is ultimately something they need to work out on their own. Hope all goes well for her! The best thing you can do is to just be there and be a friend. Interfering may not be the best thing to do. 

Post # 6
Member
2261 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Hm. Another question, do you like this guy? More than a friend? This came to mind and I just wanted to ask. If so, I can def. see why you’re thinking your girl friend is less than right at this point. 

Post # 7
Member
3769 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

I also think it’s silly for her to want to take a year off to know each other better, especially if they have been dating (even if it’s on and off) for 7 years.  How are they planning to handle the postponement?  Just pushing the date back a year or basically starting over?  The etiquette side of my says that your friend gave the ring to her as a gift, and therefor it is hers to keep.  But.. really, if I were in his shoes I’d say something like “give me the ring back and I’ll propose a second time if you still want me to”.

Post # 8
Member
355 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Which ring?  The engagement or the wedding ring?  I know in Ohio that it’s against the law to keep the engagement ring unless A: you got married or B: it was given as a gift (i.e. birthday/christmas) Otherwise, it is illegal to keep it and he can press charges in order to get it back.

Post # 9
Member
1252 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

In most states an engagement ring is considered a “conditional gift” with the expectation of marriage.  If the engagement is broken he most likely will be legally entitled to get the ring back.

Post # 10
Member
3769 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

I had no idea that engagement rings are legally considered “conditional gift”s … that’s actually pretty cool to know!

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