(Closed) My gift was never rec'd?? What to do? Do I send another gift?

posted 6 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

When was her wedding? Has she had enough time to send thank you cards? If she has, send her a quick email asking how her wedding was and mention that you hoped she liked the gift you sent.

Post # 5
Member
1181 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@HereWeGo: ohhhh, maybe the nex time you talk to her, you can ask what she ended up buying with it? Sorry, not much help…

Post # 6
Member
541 posts
Busy bee

I’d be willing to bet she got it. Just flat out ask her. You’d be surprised just who is rude enough to not thank people these days, sometimes it’s your best friends.

And just in case she actually didn’t receive it, it’s early enough that you may be able to report it lost to Macy’s, they can probably track it if you paid with a credit or debit card or if you have a receipt, and they may be able to  cancel the balance on that card and put it on a new card.

Another reason I’m sure she got it, she’s still speaking to you. If one of my best friends didn’t get me a wedding gift, I’d assume, I should take that as a sign that we really are not friends, and I’d probably back away from socializing with you. I’m sure many people will interpret that as being gift grabby, but I’m pretty sure we all would agree that we would send a gift to a close friend who got married even if we couldn’t attend.

Post # 7
Member
3053 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

Definitely just ask. People are so bad with Thank You cards nowadays, it’s awful. I was one of about 2 people I knew grewing up that actually sent them out for bday & christmas gifts. It’s so rude not to, I can’t imagine being okay never thanking someone for a gift…not even by phone??? come on.

Post # 8
Member
11233 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

This happened with us. We sent a couple of gifts off of a couple’s registry right before their wedding, and, despite seeing them a number of times after the wedding, they never mentioned it at all. It took them almost five months to get out thank you cards, and that’s the only reason we knew that someone didn’t swipe it off their porch.

Post # 9
Member
9952 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

You say that the Bride was married in January… as in January 2013 ???

The reason I ask, is because truly that isn’t so long ago (less than 3 months)… AND I myself was a January Bride, and my own Thank Yous have not gone out yet either… lol, AND I am a bit of an Etiquette Snob.

In truth, she may be waiting for photos !!

In that so many Brides now choose personalized picture printed Thank You Notes, or to send a pic along inside a regular one… waiting for one’s fully edited photos (and then a print order) is a common thing.

Infact Mrs Bracelet just recently talked about it abit in a recent WBee Blog… her being married in September, photos arriving in time for Christmas (around the 3 month mark) … and now finally she’s back on WBee ready to share her Recaps = http://www.weddingbee.com/author/bracelet/#axzz2NeFKum5Q

Photos are certainly ONE of the reasons (the main one) at this point in time that my own Thank You Cards haven’t gone out.  I personally, am aiming to get this all squared away before the end of the month of March (2 weeks from now)… but also know realistically that it could be closer to mid April, and a date that is much choser to the 3 month mark from my actual Wedding Date… and although it is “old school” Etiquette… to “write your Thank Yous on your Honeymoon”… in reality very few people do that.  And so it wouldn’t be the end of the world… or uncommon today in regards to these Personalized Photo Thank Yous, that things get sent out later.

I get your concern… afterall there is a $ 100 Gift Card hanging in the balance somewheres… but in all truthfulness.  But I’d wait just a tad longer before reaching out to the Bride.  You really need to let the 3 month mark pass.

NOTE – As per Emily Post and the book “Wedding Etiquette”… if after 3 months have passed and no thanks has been received… then the Donor of the Gift should call or write the Newlyweds to see if the Gift was indeed received.  Wording is IMPERATIVE.  The Donor should sound concerned rather than critical.  It the Newlyweds have not received the gift, then the Donor should then trace it… or replace it.  IF on the otherhand, if the couple has not sent their thanks because of thoughtlessness… then they deserve the embarrassment that this inquiry will cause.

Altho… “technically” a Bride has up to a year to write Thank You Notes… although stretching out that far would be really “pushing it”.

Hope this helps,

 

Post # 10
Member
9548 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Just yesterday I recieved a thank  you note for a wedding gift we sent to a friend whose wedding we couldn’t attend in October. Sometimes it just takes  a while for people to get those out.

Post # 11
Member
2874 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I’d wait a bit then ask her?

I did mine the day after my wedding, but its a Destination Wedding and once my guests went back to UK, the crappy mexican post would never get them there. 

If i hadn’t had to have done it like that, i would have waited until a photo was ready to make photocards (which would take a few months) and then of course writing the card itself. it took me an age just to to 40!!

Post # 12
Member
9181 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

I sent a gift to a wedding I couldn’t attend in AUGUST – never got a thank you, finally inquired, and yep they got it. Just haven’t bothered with thank-yous…

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