Post # 1
So my Gma lives with this guy (well call him Jack) and they have been dating for a few years. To be honest, he is a jerk and really really controlling. Of course I am inviting him as my grandmothers guest to the wedding. I have only met one of Jacks brothers before and am inviting him to the wedding so Jack will have someone to talk too. I also think this brother is really nice so I dont mind it. Well, my grandma calls me yesterday and says that Jack said I have to invite all this brothers (6 of them) and their spouses and his children and grandchildren. I was like “HUH?”. My grandma proceeded to explain that Jack said If I don’t invite all of them, I can’t invite any. I was only inviting the one brother as a favor to him! So when I told Jack there is no way I can afford that, that we are not having children at the wedding, and that I am not comfortable having strangers at my wedding, he flipped out! He told me I was selfish! HA!
So now my grandma is BEGGING me to invite all of them to make him happy. I told her I will only invite the one brother who I have met and that is it. In fact, I had already sent the brother the invite. Jack said if I dont invite all, he wants me to call the brother and tell him to disregard the invite. WTH! To make matters worse, we are not having any corsages or boutinerres for the parents or grandparents because by cutting this out, we are saving $200! We checked with everyone and they are ok with it. Well Jack said I need to buy him a boutinerre or he is not coming. I want to make my grandma happy and she is my everything but this is my wedding. PLEASE HELP!
Post # 3
Um, no. He doesn’t get to walk in on an event that’s on YOUR dime and start making demands. But hey, if it’s that important to him he can fork over the money, right?
Post # 4
Let him do whatever he’s going to do. Chances are his brother knows he’s a jackass and it won’t reflect on you in any way. So what if he doesn’t come?
Post # 5
Sounds to me like Jack can just stay home … was this HIS wedding and not yours? I don’t think so!
How comfortable are you with your grandma? I would just tell her flat out – I invited the one brother, he’s welcome to come – nobody else is getting invited. AND there will be no boutonierre for Jack so he’ll need to decide if he wants to come at all.
What a whacko jacko!
Post # 6
Just invite who you want to invite, buy whatever flowers you want, and let him do what he wants. It sounds like you might be better off without him there, anyway. Don’t negotiate with people like that!
Post # 7
Stand your ground. He’s crazy, selfish and ridiculous.
Post # 8
That’s so ridiculous! I’m glad that you stood your ground and didn’t give into his demands. Like other posters have said, if he wants all of his family there, he should pay for all of them too!
Post # 9
WOW! This JACK is an ASS! If he doesn’t go, will your GMA still go? If the answer is yes, then screw Jack! Just my opinion.
Post # 10
Whoah, what a crazy! I would be sure to tell him you’re not buying him a boutinneire and then keep your fingers crossed that he stays true to his word and doesn’t come :).
Post # 11
And btw, why isn’t grandma taking your side here? She should be telling him to shut up and leave you alone!
Post # 12
I really feel bad for your grandma in this situation. However, I’d leave the invitation list as is (Jack and his one brother) and not get bouts. He doesn’t like it, he can stay home. He sounds like an arse.
Post # 13
You’ve done amazingly well drawing the line with this guy so far. Just keep to your position.
Post # 14
Thanks so much ladies. I needed to hear it from someone else that I wasnt doing what was wrong. Even Fiance is like, lets jsut invite them so it doesn’t start a fight. We always let people walk over us and this time I am STANDING MY GROUND!
@KatyElle: I know 🙁 I think my grandma is scared of him. He is very controlling and I think she feels if he doesnt get his way, he might kick her out or something.
Post # 15
I agree with PP about forking over the money. And about calling Jack’s bro, just say no. About buying him something extra, just say no. If he doesn’t want to come, who cares? I hope your grandmother can come without him
Post # 16
It’s hard in situations like this because you don’t want your grandmother to be stuck in the middle, but this guy sounds bullying and unreasonable and you need to stand your ground. Be strong!