(Closed) My grooms ex wore my dress and they got married first.

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
1671 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Tazz05:  Don’t worry!!! He will totally not notice. I don’t think my husband would be able to describe my dress in any great detail. Besides, it will look the most beautiful to him on the woman he loves (You!).

But, yeah, that is a weird coincidence. But the look will probably be different because it won’t be styled the same. Hair, shoes, earrings, veil, all that jazz will be different. Congrats on your engagement! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 32
Member
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I read through this entire thread and the only thing I kept thinking was, “I want to see this dress.” Hahaha.

I’m glad that all of the comments here made you feel more at ease about everything. Things leading up to your wedding can be stressful enough without worrying about additional things like that. I’m sure you could put the dress on now in front of him and a year from now he still won’t remember the details of the dress. All he’ll remember is how radiant you look in it.

Post # 33
Member
3870 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Tazz05:  Don’t worry. Like PPs have said, it’ll be a completely different experience when he sees your dress. And over a year away? He won’t even remember!

I’ll tell you a story, and hopefully this makes you feel a little better:

When my friend got engaged, she stupidly thought it would be a good idea to show her Fiance a picture of her wedding dress and pretend it wasn’t hers. Well? He HATED IT. He hated every little thing about it. He said it was ugly, poofy, tacky, you name it, he said it. My friend was devestated. Crushed. Like gross sobbing with snot. She wanted to change her dress, but her bridesmaids talked her out of it. She kept her dress.

The day of the wedding, when the doors opened and her Fiance (now DH) saw her his jaw dropped open. He was completely in owe of her. He couldn’t stop talking about the dress and how gorgeous it looked, she looked in it, and just how amazing it was. He went on and on about the dress for DAYS after the wedding. Yes, the same dress he said he wouldn’t dress his dead grandma in for her funeral. A few days after the wedding, my friend admitted that it was the dress he didn’t like. Her Darling Husband had no idea. She finally had to pull up the same photo and show him, and he still didn’t 100% believe that her “gorgeous” wedding dress was something he ever hated.

Moral of the story: Guys don’t remember details like wedding dresses. Not only is your wedding still a year away, but your Fiance will have long forgot about it by then. Also, just because she wore the same dress, doesn’t mean it will look or feel the same. You have the advantage: you’ve seen her in the dress. What can you do to make it more you, more unique? Brooch? Sash? Different veil, different head piece? How about makeup, etc. I really wouldn’t worry. You’re going to look gorgeous. 

Post # 34
Member
2837 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Tazz05:  I honestly can’t remember in detail any wedding dress- excpet my own- and my sister’s….but that’s because I went with her to many fittings, and her dress was a matte fabric- no lace- very simple, so it’s easy to remember since I saw it so often.  Otherwise, I honestly can’t remember any other dress.  And with your weddings being a year apart– as another poster said- unless you Fiance has a serious thing for bridal gowns…..I can’t believe he would ever know they are the same!

Post # 35
Member
118 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: Studio 450

Tazz05:  I agreed with others, he won’t notice. All dresses look different on everyone, and well, he IS a man….

My only thought is that she will be at your wedding, and she will 100% recognize the dress. That would make me uncomfortable. But, if it is your dream dress, and she isn’t a nasty person, than rock it, girl!

ps. FI’s ex married his good friend and invited you all to the wedding?? Crazy stuff. 

Post # 39
Member
815 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Ya… guys don’t remember that type of stuff. He probably wouldn’t even notice the week after, let alone 12 months down the road. You are fine. In fact, the only person who would likley even remember is the bride herself.

Remember: when you are planning a wedding yourself you are likenly to notice every tiniest detail of other weddings bc that’s whats on your brain. “Normal” people (for lack of a better phrase” are not thinking that hard about it. Of the weddings I have attended in the past year or so I could probably tell you the basic gist of what the bride wore, but no way I would even close to identify the exact gown if I saw it in a store.

Post # 40
Member
2970 posts
Sugar bee

Have a different hairstyle and veil.  Wear different jewellery.  Elegant earrings are great.  Put flowers in your hair.  If you are marrying on a colder day wear a wonderful floor length cloak.  

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