(Closed) My guy

posted 8 years ago in LGBTQ
Post # 3
3316 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

We’re not exactly in that situation, but I can certainly relate to planning what is mostly a normal wedding, but running into little differences.  I thought of our wedding as pretty traditional.  However, we’d suddenly run into little issues–like how to find matching wedding dresses, or finding a ketubah (Jewish wedding contract) that didn’t mention a groom.

In any event, welcome, and best wishes on your planning!

Post # 4
1805 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Not exactly.  My fiance is what would be best described as “genderqueer” or “two spirit”.  The world sees her as a very butch lesbian.  Around the house and close friends/family, we use male pronouns.  To strangers we use “she” and “her”, just to avoid explanations, because while my honey feels like a “he”, there is no strong desire to transition and there is a physically female body that is difficult to conceal.

It’s all very confusing and hard to explain to the “outside world” but makes sense to us (and even the kids, who think of her more like a dad)..   and we’re all okay with it, but there’s no offense taken if someone refers to my honey as “ma’am”.  I will admit it’s annoying when my mom tries to buy women’s clothes/shoes for my fiance though.  It’s been 7 years, don’t know why she still thinks she can get my fiance into strappy sandals and/or makeup! lol!

I identify as a “queer femme” more than anything but I guess bisexual fits as well.  Screw labels; I am in love with the delicious mix of masculine AND feminine in my “hus-butch to be” and wouldn’t have it any other way, but we are aware of what the rest of the world thinks/assumes about the entire gender thing, we just shrug it off.

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