(Closed) My holiday vent: Dad says gma can’t come to Christmas =(

posted 9 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Hostess
18637 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Wow, I can’t believe that he is being like that.  Maybe is he worried that it would be hard to take care of her?  You could always go to her home for a day and hang out with her.

You shouldn’t HAVE to see them every holiday if other things are going on.  And you can’t travel during your third trimester anyway!  The airplanes won’t allow it.

Post # 5
Member
683 posts
Busy bee

Maybe I’m just mean, but I’d tell your parents if they don’t want to be confrontational about it, surely they won’t mind you shuffling them to a home and not picking them up for the holidays when they’re too old to help themselves. I mean, surely they won’t want to inconveniece you…

Post # 6
Member
11325 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

@sulai- lol

@ejs- sorry your parents are being hard-headed. Seems to be a trend with them. 🙁 I really don’t see what the big deal is with your grandma coming to Christmas, I would fight your dad on that. With regards to next Christmas… I get what they’re saying a little bit as I’m sure they miss you on Christmas when you aren’t there, but I understand why you’d want to stay in StL, especially if you’re pregnant. Is there any way they could come spend Christmas with you and DH’s family every other year?

Post # 8
Member
2889 posts
Sugar bee

Host your own Christmas next year and you get to make the stupid rules 🙂

In your situation, I would just go and pick up grandma myself and bring her to Christmas. How mad can your dad get at you? I mean, if he wants you to come visit again, he can’t get too upset. I’m kind of stubborn like that but seriously, what is the worst case scenario that yould come from you bringing grandma? Also, she is not getting any younger or healthier so take advantage of the time you have with her.

Post # 9
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee

Maybe I’m a jerk and dont “respect” my parents enough, but I would tell them that if grandma isn’t coming, then I’m not either! Christmas is supposed to be about celebrating as a family. I’m sorry they’re your parents 🙁

Post # 10
Member
1045 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2008

Can you call your dad and tell him how much it would mean to you to have grandma there?  He’s being really selfish.

Can you bring any of the “fun” stuff over to your parents’ house for Cmas?  Music, games, etc.?  Or would that be crossing the line?

Post # 11
Member
1508 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

UGh. I feel for you Ejs4y8.

Post # 12
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

This may be his way of telling you that he really likes spending time with you, and he doesn’t want anything to get in the way of that.

Maybe if you offer to come earlier, he’ll be more open to “sharing” you with grandma?

Good luck!

Post # 14
Member
2765 posts
Sugar bee

Sounds like you’re trying to reason with someone who may not necessarily be logical?

I haven’t had a lot of success with that in my family… plenty of crazies in my extended family tree.

Post # 15
Member
948 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Coyaba Resort, Montego Bay

If your dad is insistent, can you & your husband make time to visit your grandma in the assisted living home on Christmas Day?  Just a thought – you could get up and visit with her early in the morning, have breakfast together, etc.

The topic ‘My holiday vent: Dad says gma can’t come to Christmas =(’ is closed to new replies.

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