(Closed) My husband is an ass

posted 4 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
13012 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Is something else going on?  He seems like he lost it over something pretty minor. 

Post # 4
554 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@sweetbee29:  On no 🙁 First off, I hope you get over all of this really soon, you must be miserable being sick this long. Has this always been how he reacts to you? It seems strange that he would be so upset by this. Maybe something else is going on?

Post # 5
1475 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Yes, your husband was certainly acting like an ass last night! Maybe he was having a tough week at work and this just was the last straw and he decided to take out his frustrations on you? Still doesn’t make it right. 

Hope you feel better soon!


Post # 6
1650 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@sweetbee29:  I hope you feel better soon. I completely agree with PPs about whether something more is going on. Has he always been like this or is this something new? I know someone people are seriously clean freaks, but this seems really unreasonable to me.

Post # 7
8453 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@sweetbee29:  *HUGS*  Hope you feel better soon.  Maybe he’s just cranky because you both haven’t been sleeping well?  Hopefully, he’ll realize he’s overreacting and appologize you.  If this is the “norm” for you guys I’d consider some couple’s counseling, your last statement is a bit startling.

Post # 9
2512 posts
Sugar bee

@sweetbee29:  There has to be something else upsetting him. No one gets that upset over being irritated by snoring. I hate when people snore because I can’t sleep, but if you snoring is annoying him THAT BAD while he is awake then there is something he needs to get off his chest.

Being sick really does suck and cleaning the house isn’t going to help you get better. He should be [lovingly] taking care of you. He’s upset about his birthday? Tell him to grow up.

Post # 10
846 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Ya I wouldn’t put up with that. If it were me, I’d leave for a few days. He can’t even do “in sickness and in health”. Hope that you feel better.

Post # 11
472 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

He was like “I’m tired of this. I had to deal with you being sick on my birthday weekend.”

Holy what? I just.. I can’t even imagine even my most assholish, awful exes ever saying something like that. i can’t imagine most adults I know saying something like that. Is this a new behavior pattern for him or is this how he’s always been?

Either way, I would think some counseling would be in order. Even if this is just a short-term reaction to new stressors, you’re right, it does NOT bode well for the kind of reaction you might meet in future times of hardship.

Post # 12
294 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@sweetbee29:  next time he says anything to you about it, just say:


“If i wanted to hear from an asshole, i would have just farted.”



Post # 13
6019 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

@sweetbee29:  I would have ripped him a new asshole if he had said that to me. totally unacceptable.

However, I do think that no matter how sick you are you should be a little cleaner with things like tissues and such because that’s a good way to spread germs. I would get a small trash can and keep it by your bed for tissues and empty whenever it’s full. Even when I am sick I can do minimal things, not because im on a mission to clean but because getting rid of the germ filled things like tissues will help everyone. I understand (to an extent) being annoyed with the water bottle thing and with the tissues being on the nightstand therefore making you throw the bottle on the floor. No matter what though there is a way to address it and he can easily help you out by saying “here, here is a trash can. Ill leave this by the bed for you so you don’t leave the yucky tissues on the nightstand”.

As for the snoring that is something he needs to just shut up about and move into another room. He seems like he needs to work on his communication skills a bit. I would talk to him about it when you feel up to it because it seems ther emight be more going on than him just being annoyed with snoring.

Post # 14
1478 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Is this the norm? Is this how he’s always been? You’ve been married for a year and together for longer, so I can’t imagine that his attitude is a surprise…unless he was just truly in a spectacularly rotten mood? Just looking for a little more background info.

Post # 15
2786 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Not justfying his behaviour at all….but my husband snores, and some nights when his snoring keeps me awake and i’m exhausted, i. could. kill. him. It’s totally irrational, but i get SO ragey.

Post # 16
5242 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Bexx:  I died laughing at that LOL

 @sweetbee29:  Your husband does sound like a jerk. Is there another reason he is acting this way? Kinda seems odd he is so mad just because you are sick..everyone gets sick.

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