my husband is getting too comfortable in our relationship is this normal?

posted 2 months ago in Intimacy
Post # 2
277 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Maybe he thinks that it’s funny or cute. I’d be less understanding about it. Tell him that it’s not acceptable, ESPECIALLY if it turns you off. 

My husband and I never fart in front of each other on purpose. 

Post # 3
249 posts
Helper bee

If my partner did this during sex—not just let slip a rare accidental fart but farted loudly & obviously repeatedly during sex—I would be done having sex at that point. I think he’ll learn pretty quickly to stop if sex ends every time he lets one rip. Stop being so understanding and make clear that you need to have at least some boundaries around bodily functions. Does he have some kind of intestinal issue going on? Or does he really just not care?

Post # 4
3090 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2021

The table manners around family is definitely something you need to speak to him about and tell him to knock it off.

However, it is possible that the farting isn’t his fault. You say he leaves the room to do it. Thar suggests to me that he can’t help it but at least has the decency not to do it right in your face. 

I had some major gastrointestinal issues last year that took several months and several doctors, followed by a naturopath, to figure out. It was awful. I was gassy all the time and in pain. I had to hold my farts in all day at work and at home I tried my best to let them go in the washroom but that is damn near impossible to maintain when you literally have to fart again 30 seconds after the last one, and the longer you hold it the more us hurts. 

Is your husband in physical discomfort? He should see a Dr about it if that is the case.

Post # 6
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2020

If you brought it up to him, and he’s not acknowledging your being uncomfortable, he isn’t being a true partner to you. If he was always this way it would be one thing, but it sounds like he gradually stopped caring.

Post # 7
739 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

If he has to stop sex to run out into the hallway to let out a huge gross fart, and this happens regularly, I would think he has some sort of gastro-intestional issue, because that is not normal. I mean, everyone farts, and when you are living together you are going to let one slip every now and then. But letting out gross smelly farts “at all times of the day and night” leads me to believe a visit to the dr would be a good idea. Maybe he is lactose intolerant, or celiac or something. A diet change might make a world of difference.

Post # 8
2829 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

I have the same question as a PP, does he have stomach issues? It doesn’t seem normal or healthy to fart so much that he can’t even get through sex without having to let one out. I’ve had my fair share of stomach issues as well and it gets really uncomfortable. I would ask him to check with a doctor on that if he hasn’t already.

besides the burping at the table (could be another health issue) and not saying excuse me, is he otherwise polite and have good manners? was he like this before you got married or did you just tolerate it before?

diamondgirl523 :  

Post # 9
8662 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

diamondgirl523 :  Is it possible he has IBS or some other digestive problem? 

Post # 10
2598 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

diamondgirl523 :  if he’s farting as much as you say j think he should see either a doctor or a nutritionist or both. He could have ibs or a dietary intolerance or something

Post # 11
464 posts
Helper bee

My husband and I are totally comfortable with each other. I mean, we dont even close the toilet door when its only the two of us in the house. I don’t really care if he farts, and he doesnt care if I fart. I feel as comfortable with him as I do by myself. I’ve never felt so comfortable with any other person, and I personally like that we dont have to censor ourselves or pretend that we dont have perfectly normal bodily functions. Its not like he purposefully farts around me or anything – I wouldnt like that. I would have more of a problem with the lack of manners around other people however. My husband is very polite when we are in other peoples company. 

Post # 12
4825 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I agree with other posters, it actually sounds like he has a pretty serious problem.  Who actually stops sex to leave the room and do a massive fart? That isn’t normal, I don’t think he thinks it is cute, I think he needs to see a doctor. 

Post # 14
1027 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - A vineyard

With that much gas I agree with the others. There could be some sort of digestive issue. I have to watch my diet because I am lactose intolerant and have some other food issues but if I consume a lot of dairy it can give me painful gas among other effects. He should probably go get checked out to.make sure everything is okay.

But if it comes back he is fine then that is another issue entirely. 

Post # 15
742 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

YUCK! I do not find body functions funny. I accept them as natural and sometimes a burp/fart slips but ewww I would not tolerate what your Darling Husband is doing.

I would be firm and clear that he is disgusting you and turning you off. Tell him it needs to stop NOW or you wont want to have sex. He’ll get the message.

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