Post # 1
My 32 year old husband is buying a Porsche.
He is so excited. He works hard and deserves it and can afford it.
But I can’t help but feel weird about it. We live modestly and I feel that it’s so flashy. I keep thinking that that money would go so far in a retirement account or college funds for our future children, or a downpayment on our next house. We have plenty of savings and live way below our means, so we don’t “need” the money, but I keep thinking “what if his business slows down? What if we have a major health scare? what if….?”
His feeling is that he should be able to “live it up” now while we’re young and unaccountable. I agree with this to some extent, but I still can’t let my feelings go.
I want to be happy for him. I want to enjoy like he does. How can I reconcile my “what if” feeling with wanting him to be happy?
Post # 3
I hear ya!
Worse case scenario, you can sell the porsche 🙂
Also, life is too short, if a major health scare happens or whatever, you would want to know that you enjoyed your life and for your husband a car may be part of that equation.
I guess you should also treat yourself to something !
Post # 4
@Eva Peron: I know you’re right! He does deserve it. He called me from his test drive and I honestly have never heard him so happy in our entire 10 years together.
I think I just have to get over myself. I have always been financially conservative and have a reputation for being extremely frugal. I think, aside from being worried about the future, I’m also worried about what other people will think, which I know is crazy/stupid. I’m afraid that people will think that we can’t afford it, or that we’re being frivilous or irresponsible with our finances.
Imagine if one of your friend/family memeber who lives in a modest house and drives modest used cars and never shops/spends suddently pulls up to dinner in a Porsche. What would you think of them?
I know I shouldn’t care. If he’s happy that’s all that matters. But we’re human and these things cross my mind…..
Post # 5
My parents’ good friends always lived very frugally. A few years back, they test drove a nice BMW. The wife said she couldn’t understand why her husband was so hot on this car because he had never really cared about material things. He said “I just want to have a really nice car sometime in my life.” A few months later he had a stroke, and while he is doing ok, he won’t ever drive again. It’s nice that he got to enjoy it for the few months that he did. I guess my point is just that life is short. Let yourself be a little irresponsible sometimes.
Post # 6
and what if you guys died tomorrow before you could enjoy any of the money you have? I know that sounds terribly morbid and I hope to God it doesn’t happen to you or anyone. But, I used to worry so much about money and saving and having enough. That is a wonderful attitude to have but in moderation. It’s okay to let lose and splurge now and then. A Porsche won’t make or break you guys it sounds like. If it does, you sell it. Enjoy life now because you never know when it will end. Having this attitude has made me a much happier person, made me worry less about money and what I do or don’t have, and has allowed me to enjoy some great experiences regardless of how much they have cost!
Post # 7
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
@CanAmBride: “I keep thinking that that money would go so far in a retirement account or college funds for our future children, or a downpayment on our next house.”
You answered yourself right there. Most retirement accounts are woefully underfunded and the addition of the Porsche money really and truly would make enough of a difference. Plus, would you rather he purchase one in retirement when he really can’t afford it?
College funds for “future” children that do not yet exist and for whatever reason may not ever exist. Not to be morbid but you may never have kids or they may not want to go to college. While it’s admirable to want to pay for your child’s college, it’s not required and when I was in college many of the kids who had their college tuition paid for by their parents were not as serious about their studies or worried about changing their major from pre-med to something they actually liked because their parents were footing the bill.
And a downpayment on your next house. So you already have a house? You’re way ahead of me and many other people.
It seems like you all are responsible and able to save up decent amounts of money, let him have his car. But make sure you get a few days here and there to drive it, then you’ll have a better understanding of why he wants it.